Getting to Know a Yaujta

Chap 28

Saddest Goodbye.

Trap of Love
Snared by Desire
Trap of Love
Burn by Your Fire
Trap of Love
Snared by Desire
Trap of Love
Beware the Trap of
Love

People fear what they don't understand.

They're also afraid to admit what they feel.

What a big load of shit, right?

Scary thing is...that's exactly where I was right now. I shouldn't have been, but I'm only human after all.

I really hate myself sometimes.

000

It's been two whole days since I've gone to see him.

The first day I wanted to just pass it off as a bad dream, there was no way that that really happened between me and Krone. But...as it turns out...as I sat down on my bed hugging my knees and thinking about how I was going to pass by the garage, nightmares can't justify anything.

I have homework to do.

Sure, that excuse seemed simple enough.

Lair.

Lair, lair, lair.

I felt horrible. I knew I wasn't going to see him, I knew it, I spent the entire school day not thinking about it and knowing that I was purposely doing so. I pressed my pencil so hard that I was almost surprised that it didn't break. Break. Something was breaking but it wasn't the pencil.

Don't think about it, that was the subconscious message. I hated it. I hate myself.

When school finished I practically moved a fraction of an inch for each step I took, I was dragging my soul around while it was lagging far behind me, weighing heavily.

The closer I got to home the more I didn't want to go. I wanted to run, leave somewhere else. But I don't have somewhere else. I just kept going on either by habit or because I needed that punishment.

I really didn't want to go home. But it did.

I turned the keys and the front door slightly opened, I pushed it the rest of the way with half-hearted strength. After I took two shot steps inside I closed the door behind me, it made a thump that almost seemed significant.

I stood there a couple of minutes.

This is it then.

I started walking.

To my room.

Not to the garage.

Not to Krone.

I have homework to do.

This is why I didn't want to come home. I didn't want to do that. I was brushing it off, avoiding it, I knew I wouldn't go, I knew that I'd do this. I felt like such a bitch. I hate myself.

Why am I doing this?

It's not fair.

Why am I doing this to...

000

Krone...

"Hey, Sophie..."

I barely looked up from the curled up fetal position I had taken up in my bed.

"not now, Josh..."

"...Been here a long time...something wrong?"

"go away..."

"Fine, fine, how you spend your Saturday is your business..." I heard him sigh, "Sophie...you know, if there's anything you wanna share..."

"I don't wanna talk about it..."