Welcome to Teufort

Meet the Parents (Headcanons)

i have been waiting to make this forever now. YASSSSSSSSSSS BOI. Also i use the mercs actual names in this. So enjoy.

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Scout

His ma had been demanding you meet you for months now. So finally Jeremy had decided you both would take a trip to boston for the holidays. When you get there, His ma practically tackles you in excitement. Drags you literally everywhere around the house, showing you pictures of Jeremy's entire family. Embarrassing Jeremy to the max. Jeremy's Ma has adopted you at this point. There is no leaving.

Demoman

Tavish is dreading this event. He knows his mum is going to be obnoxious with everything. He knows and is mentally preparing himself with tons of scrumpy. When you finally meet the woman, you aren't surprised when she begins to rant on how Tavish finally brought home a woman to meet her. Loud arguing between mother and son. You slightly expected this. Tavish up and running off to the nearest bar. His mum calms down and begins to converse with openly you. She hits you with her cane more times then you care to count. She turns out to be really chill and is openly asking for grandchildren soon. You end up leaving in a red faced mess.

Engineer

Unlike Scout and Demo, Dell is really excited for you to meet his parents. He's had the trip planned for more than a month now, a little too jittery to get to his home town. You notice his southern accent has become more noticable, the closer it gets to time to meet his parents. He's been acting like an excited child. When you finally meet his parents, you are pleasantly surprised to find his mom is a sweet old lady. His father on the other hand seems stern with you but after the first day with them, that grumpy stern act leaves him. His mom finds you absolutely adorable. Ends up dragging you to help her cook or bake throughout the visit. Sad and teary goodbye when you get ready to head to Teufort.

Medic
(i pulled some bs on this one because none of this is canon at all lol)

Family? What family? So many questions in your head its not funny. Medic never really spoken about his past, much less his family. So to hear him ask if you wanted to meet them, surprised you quite a lot. He told you that only his father was still living. Upon meeting him you feel slightly vulnerable under the Ludwig's fathers glare. It takes over a rough while for him to warm up to you.

Sniper

You practically lit up like a Smissass tree when Mundy told you he was taking you to meet his parents. He seems to avoid the subject until now. After the long trip to Australia, his mum hugged you both once you both exited his camper van. Mundy's father has a stern face for the most part especially when arguing about Mundy's job, only grinning at you both asking when the wedding was, to which you both turn into tomatos. Like Scout, lots of embarrassment for Mundy.

Spy

(I honestly didn't know what to put for spy. Like at all so sorry for this one)

Spy doesn't show you to his parents being a spy and all, but he does take you to his home country and the town he grew up in and gifts you with lavish presents

Pyro
(

Again sorry for this one too, i'm trying)

Pyro pushed you out the door without so much as a warning, taking you to the flower shop in teufort. After paying for beautiful roses, Pyro gives you a map with a red dot on it. Pyro's flailing finally gives you a clue, that is a destination. While transporting Pyro with absolute care, you arrive at your destination. A cemetery. You facepalm until Pyro sets the flowers brought earlier on fire and throws them into the graveyard. You sigh, knowing once again you'll be dealing with the local fire department.

Heavy

You were quite startled when Misha suddenly told you to pack for a trip. You honestly thought you were gonna die from someone chasing you. Once on the plane, Misha finally stated you both were going to visit his family. Of course, who in their right mind would try to hunt the brute of a heavy weapons guy? You thought when a familiar face crossed your mind. Blu sniper. Russia was a lot colder than you expected. Misha had told you it was but instead you opted to bring summer clothing, with being rushed and all. Heavy kept you close as you both hike through the snow to his home, you nearly catch frostbite all the while. Once you see the snug cabin that Misha could call his home, made you slightly jealous. His sisters run out to meet you both, hugging Misha while inspecting you and speaking among themselves in Russian. You nervously stay a few feet away because god these terrifying women could tear you apart in less then a second. Misha's mother greets you and hugs you too, causing the tension to ease from you. You and Misha both have a good ole time. You learn a lot from Misha's sisters and mother. They all love you but will probably kill you if you try to leave.

Soldier

Jane has been screaming about you meeting his old roommate.Literally drags you to an old castle near teufort. You are surprised to meet a grumpy old wizard with raccoons. Jane introduces you to Merasmus. Lots of yelling and cursing at Jane. You are so confused. Like why are we even here if he doesn't like you? You shortly get your answer when Merasmus calms down and begins to converse somewhat normally. You learn a lot about Jane and his "adventures" with Merasmus.