All by Myself

Wondering and Walking

I didn't read over it. So ignore errors.

Chapter 4

I couldn't stop thinking about that girl I saw in the crowd.

Who was she?

Why was she looking at me?

Could she mean something to me?

All these questions flooded my head.

Now I just wish I would've gone and talked to her.

I hate that about myself. I don't have any courage to talk to girls. I suck at taking to them. I get shy, nervous, and never know what to say.

Why can't things be easier?

"Niall."

I was snapped out of my gaze by zayn calling my name.

"I've been calling your name for the past minutes trying to get your attention? You ok lad?"

"Oh yes, I'm fine. What did you need?"

"Good. I was just wondering if you wanted to walk around the city with me before we have to go to sound check."

The city? I can't even remember the city we were in. Or when we got here.

"Sure. Just let me go get ready real quick."

Zayn walked away, and I got out of my bunk and headed to the bathroom.

Mirrors.

They're everywhere. I hate mirrors.

Just a wonderful reminder of who I am.

Skinny little Irish boy.

I try my best to keep my thoughts positive. But it just doesn't work sometime.

I also try my best to not let the guys know what's really going on inside my head. I'm scared that if I told them, they would take me to some sort of mental institute.

Which is exactly what I don't want. Or need.

I'm not that bad. Really, I'm not.

I know people have it worse than me, and I feel so bad for people like that.

It makes me really upset to see people like that, even our girls.

I just wish that every single one of them knew how much we loved and cared about them.

I walked out of the bathroom and out the bus to already see zayn greeting a few fans outside. The crowd wasn't that big which was kind of surprising.

After we said our hellos, and signed some posters, me and zayn were headed down the street.

"So what city our we in now?" I asked, still unknowing of where we were.

"Chicago." Zayn replied half heartedly

We walked down the rest of the street of not saying anything.

"You know Niall. Me and the lads are all worried about you." Zayn caringly said breaking the dreadful silence between us.

"We all really care about you. And have been noticing that you haven't been the happiest lately"

Can they really see that? Am I showing it too much?

"We want the best for you. And we want to remind you that if there is anything, anything at all. We are here for you. We love you so much."

I stopped walking and looked at zayn.

"Thank you" I said with a smile.

Zayn smiled happily and turned away to start walking again.

We turned onto some more streets, and finally went into a store.

Zayn found something's to buy, but I didn't.

As we walked out of the store, something in the corner of my eye caught my attention.

I cocked my head slightly to side in excitement. But no one was there.

My heart sank a little.

We walked a little farther. And there I saw it again.

But nothing.

Ok Niall. Maybe you're just seeing things. No one is there.

We turned onto another street and went into another little store.

Still the fans have not caught up with us yet, which is very very unusual.

Zayn and I both didn't find anything to buy here, so we walked out.

"I got this hat for watch for Liam's birthday" zayn said showing me as we turned another corner.

"Oh that's - "

"OW! Hey! Watch it next time!"

A girl yelled after I ran into her and split her coffee onto her.

"Oh my. Um. I'm sorry. It's my fault. Um. Please. Let me help you." I said nervously not knowing what to do, and trying to help her.

"No no. It's fine. It was a crappy cup of coffee anyway. Haha" the girl chuckled.

I helped her up.

My eyes widened.

No. This can't be. Is it?

"Well, I should probably go now, thanks for getting rid of my coffee for me. I'm Natalie by the way."

Natalie. What a beautiful name. For a beautiful girl.

"I'm sorry again, Natalie, umm. I'm Niall. And this is zayn." I said shaking her hand.

"Well it was nice to run into you. Niall and Zayn" Natalie smiled.

Oh how her smile was beautiful.

She turned to walk away. But I wanted to tell her so much more. I wanted to learn more about her. I want her to tell me about the words to her favorite songs, the unforgotten melodies. I want her to tell me how they go together wither worst and best memories.

But I didn't know what to say.

And just watched her walk away.

So this chapter was very much needed. So sorry it took forever to write, I had really bad writers block, and had no idea what to write. I hope you all like it!!! And tell me what you think.