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Dream ( Bucky Barnes )

Bucky Barnes x Reader

In which the Bucky falls for the reader while struggling with his past, his friendship with Steve, his dreams and his relationships with anyone, afraid to trust; for good reason.

Word Count: 2,850

Inspired By: Dream (Imagine Dragons)

A/N: I was actually going a different way with this yesterday but this is what I ended up with- not sure how I feel about it, but I like it at the same time if that makes sense??

And I'm short of the others dreams of being golden and on top
It's not what you painted in my head
There's so much there instead of all the colors that I saw

All he knew was pain and cold.

Remembered too much from his past? Too many questions about a mission? Or worst yet for them, when his walls came down completely and he missed his mark on purpose because Bucky Barnes would be damned if he ever hurt a single innocent person. They knew what to do in these cases: over a thousand volts of electricity pumped into him, the familiar Russian words spoken, and then frozen.

For seventy years, this was the life of James Buchanan Barnes, better known as The Winter Soldier. But not anymore. He had woken up. He had managed to drop off the grid completely, keeping away from anyone and everyone, but still terrified every day that someone would come for him, knocking down his door and taking him back to that life he wanted nothing to do with.

Every day the same thoughts ran through his head like a nightmare he couldn't escape. I killed people I didn't even know. I worked for an organization for seven decades that my best friend and I fought to destroy. I killed Howard Stark. I could have killed Steve. The last of the those thoughts tormented him the most.

His scrawny best friend from Brooklyn all those years ago, too stupid to run from a fight, who fought every big punk bully who came his way, before he wore the flag on his chest and after, had tried to get Bucky to see who he was, nearly getting himself killed in the process because he had flat out refused to punch back.

I could have killed Steve.

The dreams, the reality, the pain he'd caused countless of families, the pain he had caused himself when he had finally woken up, realizing what he had done to his best friend.

His brother.

He couldn't face it, it was easier to run away, to keep away from the one person left he knew because what if it happened again?

Don't let it happen again. Don't get close to anyone.

So he remained cut off, afraid of anyone or anything that would cause him pain, no matter what kind. He'd had his lifetime supply.

Of course the pain never really went away, the dreams, the memories of what he had done haunting him every night in his sleep, tormenting him, keeping him ensalved to Hydra no matter how far he ran from them. He could never- would never- really be free.

But I wanna dream
I wanna dream
Leave me to dream

He had always hoped that maybe someday, he could have the normal life he'd always wanted. The life he and Steve had talked about so many times, to go home to their wives, their kids, but he knew it couldn't happen anymore.

His pain, his fear, his history. No one would want him anymore, so he stayed alone. His dream life gone before he even had a chance to ask for it.

His pain, his fears, his loneliness seemed to lessen the day you came into his life.