Written

S e v e n t y - S e v e n

I wait there by the door waiting for you to go ahead and go first. I'm trying to be kind, but all you can be is rude.

"Well are you gonna go? Or are you going to just stand there?" you say. I look back and try to explain that I was only waiting for you, but you look at me with a mean look like you want me to leave. Leave to go where? I don't know maybe out. Maybe away.

We joke around sometimes and you thought it was just another joke, but I took it another way. You are too challenging, too competitive. When ever we were in a game you would tell me "Can you go any faster?" I would sit there trying my best to think of something to write down. Anything about the topic we were learning about. How to spell it. Then I got it, but before I could write it down you would say, "Well this is taking forever," and you would take the paper right out of my hands.

I waited for you to hand it back to me for my turn again, but you never did.

"Why did I never get the paper back?" I'd ask.

"Because your too slow and I wanted to win, but because of your slowness we lost." You would tell me over and over, every time we played a silly game.

I wanted to tell you "it's just a game." or "not everything is about winning," but I was afraid you would yell at me again.

You hangout with the people that are kind to me in class. I wish I could tell them about you, but they wouldn't understand. I would have to choose. Deal with you or leave forever and never look back, because for all I know I'm not important, I'm a slow learner, I am nothing, but a loser.

You make me feel like garbage just waiting to be thrown away. Because I feel nothing, but that's only because I am nothing.