Trollpasta the fighters

part 1:

Warning:the tragedy you are about to witness contains the following: innuendos, an orgy of cursing, intense, EXTREME VIOLENCE, Gore, poor literaci, and the most atrocious writing you'll ever read.

In other words, NSFW (Not Safe For Work)

Content is not appropriate for anyone, viewer's discressoin is demanded.

I'm sure everyone's heard of Creepypastas. I mean, if you haven't, the fuck are you doing here? READ SOMETHING AMAZING/FUCKING HORRIBLE!!!!!!

Anyways, the most recent creation of the dead fandom (at least as far as I know) that doesn't have Mr.Creepypasta working on it is Creepypasta the fighters:the concept for a fighting game featuring creepypasta characters. (Redundancy is suck) The idea was created by MaxGomora1247, an artist on DeviantArt. However several other people have contributed to the conceptual project. Most notably, Real Humanity Games has created an official game that can be found on either the Apple or Play store. Whether or not it is actually a physical realization of the fanon or just a case bootleggers jumping on dead trends remains to be seen.

Now I have to give you a disclaimer. I am NOT a gamer. I don't play video games. I am not at all obsessed with (nor play too many) video games. I'm not like other gamers. I know everything there is to know about games. I guess you could call me a gaming genius. Then again, I doubt you give a shit, so let's just move on...

Now, I have to remind you, this isn't like those other haunted gaming creepypastas. At no point did a character from a game break the fourth wall. At no point did I walk into a room filled with HYP3R-REALISTICC CUM!!! lining the walls. Pls believe me, this story definitely happened.

So it was a late Saturday morning, and I was fapping to some clop-fiction on the internets when I heard a ring at the doorbell. I finished up my uh, "business time" and went downstairs. I tripped on some fruit punch that was on the floor. I assumed it was just lag. I got up, pulled the vibrator out of my asshole, and threw it on the ground. When I got up, i tripped on my own leg. As I fell to the ground, I had an anurism.

I got up, and finally learned how to walk. With my newfound ability, I maneuvered myself to the front door. I slid my cum-stained hand against the door. I opened up the mail-slot. It won't budge. I pulled the mail-slot open.

Oh.

I grabbed the mail. I pulled my own hand out of the mail slot. I closed the mail-slot. I made a "clap" noise as I did.

Afterwards, I found that the mail was a zip-lock bag the size of some kind of strange 2X4 toy brick, of which could be used to make miniature structures and models. I opened the zip-lock bag.

What was inside the zip-lock bag, was an average sized zipblock bag. This one was entirely covered in sharpie for... Some reason...
The bag contained an entire Blobriendo 85 system. The words "AYE LADDIE, DO YA WANNE GET SUED." Were scribbled on the bottom in sharpie

Not just the console, and the controller but EVERYTHING. all the add-ons, all the Fuckbois. All the lonk cables to play said Fuckboi games. All the add-ons for the Fuckboi. All the add-ons for the BES. (Now with B85 logos on them) All the add-ons for the SBES.
every single thing to play anything excluding the the post-Fucktriangle era. Even things that weren't even released.
Everything Ever.
Every single fucking thing.
Everything that ever was to do with retro Blontendo ever.
Including Every single issue of Blobriendo superpower magazine.
Ever. In the history of gaming. Every single fucking thing imaginable, even the mother fucking Fuck. mother fucking boi. mother fricking vibrator. (FBV)

Ass.

Now, when I say "EVERY FFUCKING THSJFB RJJAJQHRJWO" I don't mean every copy that was produced. I mean, 1 of each. (Or in the case of the controllers, 8 of each)