The Heart of Wonderland

Chapter 3

Alison's throat felt tight and she attributed it to the freezing temperature of the liquid she'd just swallowed, but the pressure didn't ease and after a moment she began to panic. She tried to swallow around the lump in her throat but couldn't. Her chest felt as though someone was standing on it, preventing her lungs from filling with air. She struggled to draw breath and managed a few gasps, but each one was more difficult than the last. She began to grow light-headed and the room dimmed around her. Black spots danced in front of her eyes.

"Poor kid," she heard a woman's voice say sadly.

"She's going to have a lot to deal with when she wakes up," agreed another.

Alison strained to call out to the voices. "I'm here," she tried to tell them, but nothing came out. She clawed at her throat, trying to force herself to breathe, to speak, but all that came out were strangled rasps. The room grew dimmer still and the voices seemed to recede, though now they were joined by the sound of a shrill, head-splitting alarm.

Alison's legs collapsed beneath her and she crumpled to the floor in a heap, hitting her head as she fell. She groaned at the pain and when she managed to open her eyes again, she realized with a jolt that somehow the world had shifted once more.

A needle attached to a tube protruded from the back of her hand and there was something clipped to her index finger. She had a plastic cuff wrapped tightly around her arm, squeezing so hard her hand was numb. She lay in a narrow bed with machines beeping all around her. She tried to speak again and found that her throat was still constricted. Strong arms reached for her, holding her down when all she wanted was to get up and away from this place.

"Alison, can you hear me?" asked a woman dressed in scrubs. "You're in a hospital. You've been hurt badly. Do you understand?"

A man with a stethoscope around his neck added, "There's a tube in your throat helping you breathe. It's important that you don't pull it out. It's ok, we're going to take care of you."

Alison struggled against the hands holding her and somehow managed to wrench one arm free. She reached up to her mouth to confirm the truth of the man's words and was horrified to discover her face confined in a mask with a length of plastic tubing attached. She tried to scream, but nothing came out.

A nurse grabbed her arms again and held her still while a doctor loomed over her. Alison's heart raced as he reached toward her. She understood that he was about to remove the tube, but she was almost as frightened of having it removed as she was of leaving it in. What if she couldn't breathe without it? What if he made a mistake and hurt her even worse than she already was?

Then the doctor's latex-gloved hand was steadying her jaw while the other gripped the tube and began to slide it steadily out of her throat. It scraped and burned her oesophagus, and she gagged and coughed.

"I know your throat hurts," a nurse told her, brushing a strand of long platinum hair back from Alison's damp forehead, "but it will be better soon. Don't try to talk right away—give yourself a chance to catch your breath."

Alison ignored the nurse's order. "Where am I?" she rasped as soon as the doctor pulled away. The sight of the long, plastic coil in his hand made her stomach churn. She shuddered at the thought that it had been shoved down her throat, maybe all the way down to her lungs.

Alison's aunt stepped forward from a corner where she had been watching Alison struggle to wake up and breathe on her own.

"You're in the hospital, honey. There was an accident on the way to the airport. Your father..." She took a deep breath and wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. "Your father lost control of the car and you hit your head on a window. You have a bad concussion, but you'll be ok now."

"Aunt Caroline?" Alison could barely force the words out, but she had to know what had happened. "What are you doing here? Where are Mom and Dad?"

Caroline exchanged a significant look with the doctor.

"We'll give you two a few minutes to catch up on things," he said. He and the nurses filed out of the room.

The one who had held her hand glanced back at her sympathetically. "I'll just be out at the desk," she assured Alison, pausing at the door. "The call bell is attached to the bed rail on your right." She gave Alison a small, sad smile and closed the door gently behind her.

Caroline sat gingerly on the edge of Alison's bed and took a deep breath. "There's no easy way to say this..." she started.

Alison's breath caught in her damaged throat, anticipating what her aunt was about to say.

"No!" she interrupted. "You're wrong—they have to be fine. Where are they? Tell me!" She threw back the covers and swung her legs over the edge of the bed, but when she tried to stand, the room swam and she was forced to sink back against her pillows.

Alarms went off and bells clanged around her as her pulse skyrocketed from the exertion. The door flew open as two nurses rushed into the room. Their eyes scanned the room, looking for signs of danger or distress.

"It's ok," Caroline said, standing. "She's just had some distressing news."

The older of the two nurses glanced at Alison again to confirm that all was well—at least physically. "You've suffered a serious injury and it's dangerous to overexert yourself," she scolded mildly. "There's been serious swelling and bruising of your brain. If your blood pressure becomes too high, there's a risk of further injury."

Caroline bit her lip and looked back at Alison. "I'll try to see that she stays calm."

"May I speak with you in the hallway, please?" the nurse asked quietly. Aunt Caroline nodded and followed, but left the door ajar. The younger nurse shifted uncomfortably.

"Very worried about her..." the other nurse's voice wafted in from the hallway. "Needs to stay calm....may have to sedate her..."

Alison tried to raise herself up on her elbows, but a wave of exhaustion overwhelmed her. Her head throbbed as she tried to concentrate on the conversation happening outside her room.

Caroline returned to Alison's bedside and stroked her face. "I know you're hurt and confused, and I'm so sorry this is happening, but we have to keep you calm right now. Your parents didn't survive the accident, but I know they would want you to do everything you can to get better."

Alison shook her head weakly. There had been some mistake, she knew it. She and her parents were going to Italy together, so they couldn't be dead.

"You're wrong," she whispered as a tear rolled down her cheek. "It's not true."

Caroline's eyes welled up with tears of her own. "I'm so sorry," she repeated. "But you're not alone. I'm here for you, no matter what. I promise."

Alison closed her eyes. She knew Aunt Caroline meant well, but nothing could take away the shock and disbelief. Behind her eyelids, colors danced in time to the throbbing in her head, and she thought of the strange dream she'd had before waking up. Frightening though it had been, she would give anything to go back there again.