The Compulsion Of Love

I Need Me My Margaritas

"There goes my heart beating,
Cause you are the reason,
I am losing my sleep..
Please come back now"

I sigh with a smile as I watch the guy on the stage singing the romantic number.

"I think I am in love", I muse to myself.

Suddenly, there is a chocking noise followed by a snort, I turn my head to face my two best friends , Kerry, who is covering her mouth with the tissue and Leslie, who unapologetically is laughing on my face .

"What?", I ask with the meanest stare I could muster, not that I was really mad at them but it was just fun to get a reaction out of them. Call me twisted but whatever, it's fun.

Leslie finally stops her snort laughter (And yes, that's a thing. I just saw it happen) and looks at me like I have grown another head and I can't really say that I don't know why she is giving me that look.

Here's a few facts about me you need to know to understand her:

1. My name is Alissa May. Cute, I know. Well, it's actually Alissa Mary May.
2. I am a 29 year old college Professor.
3. This one is the big one. I have NEVER fallen in Love.

Yes, contrary to the facts various meme pages or fact pages present you, some people do not fall in love , not the real kind. Well, not the kind I have seen my friends fall into, which has ultimately lead us to this day. Here, at this bar; listening to the handsome guy with a panty dropping smile, serenade the crowd with his sexy country drawl at the weekly Saturday Kareoke night, apparently.

See, even though I didn't or maybe just can't fall in love ; my both best friends did and one of them i.e. Kerry , is getting married tomorrow. So here we are, just the three of us, in a local bar of her hometown celebrating her last night as a single woman ; well more like celebrating her becoming a Mrs. tomorrow, according to her. Love.

"You in love?", Leslie begins, breaking my chain of thoughts, "I would love to see that but I can't see any pigs flying!", she pauses and looks at Kerry, "Can you?"
And yet again, I am greeted by her snort laughter. How wonderful.
"Hey, don't be mean Les, she can fall in love.", Kerry finally speaks, with doubt floating in her voice. Yeah, I heard that undertone, girl. See, Kerry is sweet and Leslie is Sassy and Me ? I can be bit of both. But in this moment, I chose to be depressed.

"Thanks, Kerr but it's true, the day pigs fly is the day I finally fall in love. And love at first sight , like I was intuiting minutes ago , is out of question" , I say with a sigh and then gulp down the whole alcohol infused margarita (My 4th, maybe that's why I am being so needy).

Kerry opens her mouth to reply but stops short when Benette, her fiancé and husband to be, slides his hands around her wait from behind her and pull her closer, making her inch back on the bar stool she was sitting on. She instantly perks up as she feels his hands around her and lean back.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Ryan, Leslie's fiancé come behind her. (Yes, both of my best friends are engaged and I don't even freaking have a crush! Or maybe I do ? The sexy singer ? Does he qualify as a crush? I need another margarita.)

"Hello, Ladies", Benette greets us, but his attention is solely focused on Kerry, who I think has a little drool in her mouth. And not a second later, they are making out like teenagers.
It was cute seeing them all over each other and so in love a few times but now it's gross. Not them being in love , but the make out part.
Nonetheless, they are a great couple.

Theirs was a cute high school romance, and then the cliched bad break up after high school and then a sudden reunion years later and boom! The love was still there and more than ever! It's been 3 years since then and they are still nauseatingly in love with each other.

I turn my head slightly and see Les and Ryan staring at each other while they slowly bring their drinks to their mouth; One word for their actions: Foreplay.

I shake my head and smile and turn my attention back to the sexy singer.

"And I'd climb every mountain"

You can climb me anytime..
What can I say? I have a dirty mind. Just because I haven't been in love doesn't mean I am a saint. Just sayin. And yes, I am a college professor, but I am a woman with needs first!

"And swim every ocean
Just to be with you
And fix what I've broken
Oh, 'cause I need you to see
That you are the reason"

SWOOOON!!

Maybe I'll take him home tonight. Heh.
(Like that's even gonna happen, not that I can't , cause hey, I am fairly good looking and pretty okayish flirt. But tomorrow is Kerr's wedding and I don't want to take a risk)

I focus back at the singer and any libido action that was happening, stopped.

Because right there on the stage , the sexy singer was down on one knee, holding a ring between his fingers and proposing to a petite brunette.

Freaking Fabulous, the guy I was finally thinking about getting lucky with after months of ignoring my lady parts, turns out to be taken , proposing to his girlfriend after minutes of me setting my sights of him and making me feel ashamed of having those thoughts!

I know there was no way I'd have known that he was gonna do that but I can't help but feel ashamed and a bit stupid.

And thank the gods , this happened after my two friends got preoccupied , otherwise I would never hear the end of it.

I need a drink. Maybe two.

Fuck it. I'll get the whole bottle and we'll write our own love story in drunken haze!

I don't need a man, I need me my margaritas!