Call me Gates

Mary's Past

*Gates*

I can't stop thinking about that call. It's just like Mary, all over again. I won't allowed it. I couldn't do nothing about Mary but this is my daughter. That woman won't have my little girl, she's my daughter even if I only know her for five minutes. 

I left her with Mark at the coffee and gone for a walk, I just want to go and talk with the old woman but I can't until Dayana tells me what happened. I decide to call Matt instead.

***

-Thanks for coming man!

I hug Matt as he appears in my sight. We agreed to meet in this low profile bar where no one will know who we are or try to mess with us.

-So, what happened? Is Dayana okay?

-Sort of. Not very well, no. Not why I called you about. 

-What is it then?

He looks at me while taking a sip of his beer and I do the same thinking where will I start explaining things, it's not even my story to tell.

-So you remember Mary? - He makes a stupid face to my stupid question - Right, remember that day a week or so before we left, when me and her argued and she was all weird and crying?

-Yes, of course. Never understood what happened that day. She didn't looked like Mary at all. 

-She wasn't herself. Mary's mother, Juliet, sad some pretty nasty things to her. Nothing new to Mary, as she said, Juliet was never a good mother. The important thing is, Mary battle with depression and all sort of mental issues because of her mother.

I look at Matt that is looking at me with shock in face, no one would think that of Mary, not my sweet Mary

-But she was always so happy. I remember how everyone loved her and talked about how happy she was.

I laugh with scorn, she wasn't happy. She couldn't know happiness.

-She wasn't happy. I think the last time she was truly happy was when she was 13 or 14 - Matt touches my shoulder and I look to him - Even when we were together she wasn't happy. I knew it back then and I still left her when she needed me most. I left her with the woman who broke her in the first place. 

By now I feel tears rolling down my face. Mary was my first love, the woman who won my heart and kept it forever, even today. I couldn't help her, I only made her life worse.

-She was a train wreck you know? Her tights were full of scars, her arms too. Haven't you noticed how she was always with long sleeves. Even during summer, she would wear something to cover the scars, even make up. She had her demons man, oh if she had, they were fierce, never giving her rest. In the end she was her worst enemy and her mother the catalyst that started every fucking breakdown. I was always there when she had them, I'd try to help but I knew I couldn't do much. She was a train wreck, the most perfect one. But she was my perfect train wreck and I let her go!

I punch the table, crying like a boy now. I'd never forgive me for leave and let her stay alone with my kid and her stupid mum.

-But why her mum was the catalyst?

-She blamed Mary for something, she never told me what. Juliet spent 5 years telling how worthless, dumb, stupid and a fool Mary was. That took something from her, I noticed the diference through the years but she never told what really was the problem even though she shared most with me. I just wish I took her with me when we left with the band.

-You know she wouldn't leave. Her mum could be the worst but she would never abandon her. - I nod to his words, I know it's true - Does Dayana know?

I look at him and talk before sip my beer

-I don't know. But she is the same as her mother and I don't know how to help her. To make things even better her grandmother wants her. I can't lose her. I can't let her go to that house again. 

-You are her dad. You gonna make for her what you couldn't for your Mary. Before it's too late. Be her father.

-What if I fail? 

Matt smiles at me and holds my arm

-You are her father. You won't fail!