CHAPTER 4:
It's been a few days since the whole "massage" incident, and I haven't heard from Matt since. Rolling out of bed, I go to the bathroom and do my hygiene. Honestly, I miss him a whole lot. His hugs, his forehead kisses, and Good Lord that nice ass body. My Nigga by YG starts playing from my phone, telling me Nicky crazy ass was calling.
"Hello" I answered, although I had half mind not to.
"What the hell is wrong with you Angela?" Nicky yelled.
"Ugh, One it's too damn early for your attitude, and two what the hell are you talking about?"
"Too early my ass. It's too early in your relationship for you to be fucking it up."
"Please tell me how I'm fucking up my relationship."
"Matt called venting to me about you and your insecurities. Matt is NOT David he will not put you down, and he sure as doesn't appreciate you talking about yourself the way you do. Sis you need to get it together or you're gonna lose him."
"I know he's not David. I don't understand how my feelings on myself bothers everyone but, whatever."
"Fuck all that whatever shit Angie. You know damn this insecurity shit was never you so don't play. David did this shit to you, so don't act like you was always like this. Ma always taught us to love ourselves or did you forget when that bitch David started putting you down. You use be cocky as hell, wore whatever you pleased, yet now it's hard to get you into a damn dress. You need to do some soul searching and find your real self. The Angela I know that didn't give two shits what anyone had to say about her because she was gonna do her anyway. When David started cheating on you began insecure, and I completely understood that then, but for you to be still like the this after being divorced for two years. I honestly think you need to go see a psychiatrist. David damage to you is a lot deeper than we thought. I have to go though, so I'll talk you some other time. Bye." Nicky hung up, leaving me in my feelings. I hadn't even noticed I was crying. I want Matt to hold me. I needed him right now. Throwing on some jeans, and my Uggs I drove to his office. When I got there his receptionist looked at me with concern, and pointed to his office. When I got to the door I knocked.
"Come In" Matt yelled. I opened the door, and he looked up from his seat then, came and embraced me.
"Baby, What's wrong? Are you okay?" Matt said. Checking my face and body. I just nodded.
"I'm sorry." I said, while hugging tightly.
"I didn't think David hurt me so much that I changed. I changed so much when Nicky told me about myself today. I didn't remember the person she said I once was. That's some real sad shit. How could I ever let someone especially David trifling ass cause me to lose myself. I'm sorry for involving you in my bullshit. If you don't wanna be with me anymore I completely understand." I said, while loosen myself from his embrace. As I was about to open the door, Matt quickly pushed his body against mine on the door, I sandwiched between his body and his cherry wood door.
"First of all I already forgave you. Second, Angel you're a beautiful, educated, classy, sassy, independent, and sexy African-American woman. Don't you dare lie to yourself and say you don't remember who you are. You never lost yourself, he just fucked up your self esteem a bit but, that's something I can fix. I'm not letting you go because of something as minor as this. Angel I love everything about your body, and if I have to constantly show you how beautiful you are, I will." Matt said sincerely, while looking directly in my eyes. His hands went from over my head to gripping my hips.
"I love how wide your hips are." His hands moved up to my waist.
"I definitely love how your waist is a bit smaller than your hips, especially how my hands can grip them. I know I will appreciate when I finally make love to you." Moving his hands to my butt. He closed his eyes.
"Mmmm Good God. This ass is like the perfect size. It's tortuous watching you walk away. I swear it jiggles a bit just for me. Every time I see it I wanna bend you over." He explained, while squeezing my butt cheeks. Matt's hands moved up my sides, and grabbed my breast.
"I swear the twins are constantly flirting with me. They're my own personal pillows when we cuddle at night." He finally opened his eyes and stopped biting his bottom lip. His hands cupped my face. "Those beautiful brown eyes are my kryptonite. They make me wanna give you the world and more. Those plump lips make me want to bite them. Your little button nose is adorable." He said as he placed kisses all over my face. "I know we exactly love each other yet but, I can't wait until we do and when we do you'd already know how to love yourself again."
