Severed

Chapter 7

I can't exactly say whether my deal with Magic made my life better or not. I do have more magical energy and a closer-than-sister spirit bonded to me, but I also bear huge scars from it, have no memory of what I call my previous life, and am forever marked by the deal. I think the fact that I have Hallie with me makes it ok.

"Who was I?"
That was my first question when I was told I was to be married. My next question was for myself.
"Is that why I ran away and made a deal with Magic?
When those 2 questions were answered, that's when I would finally understand my past. Unfortunately that must not have been meant to happen because right as Ace said, "You really don't remember? Hallie you were p..." he was cut off. A shimmering, shadowed figure whipped by and drew a dagger across the other boys neck. No spell or anything, just brutally honest killing. I didn't recognize the spirit as Hallie right away because she prefers to use magic over plain swordsmanship which is more my thing. Once I realized it was her- cause she was using my style of swordplay, lots of spiraling, twisting motions- my scream pierced the air faster and louder than an arrow. "HALLIE!" I roared, "don't touch him!" The warning wasn't a second too soon. Blood had already started sliding slowly from where Hallie's dagger had pressed into his neck. I could almost see his heat pounding in his chest when he dropped his broadsword the few inches back into its sheath at his side. It was a heavy, brute force, sword made for big blows and stuns. But it was strange; Ace wasn't a fighter. He liked magic and books and... For a split second I knew the boy in front of me, but, as fast as the memory came, it was gone again. Just another piece of my past making up the puzzle that was my life. Then Ace yelped and I fixed my state on a now visible Hallie behind him, staring her down. The tension that hung in the air only intensified when she pulled the dagger another millimeter across Ace's neck and hardened her stare. Since she was half me I knew what she wanted to say; "he knows, he knows, he knows. Her past. He knows. Can't let her know. Can't let him say. Must stop him. Kill him. She says no. Can't say no to her. She is me. What to do. Torn, torn, torn..." She was frantic by this point and I wasn't sure I could talk her down from the edge before Ace got hurt so I didn't what I had to; I used a spell on her. Instant knockout would work, though it would affect me too. Moving my hands slowly as to not draw her attention, I began the hand motions and said, "don't do it Hallie. You're half of me and you know what happens when we don't agree". I lined up my fingertips together, pointing my middle fingers downward and then turned my hands so that my three outstretched fingers faced Hallie. I continued, "Hallie, he's not going to tell me. He won't" then I added, "Why can't I know my past, Hallie?". I turned my middle fingers out to line up with the others as she answered, "I can't let you know what you where before. Magic won't let me". My spell was ready  and just waiting for me to speak the final words. I knew the consequence of using a spell on half of my soul, but I also couldn't see a different way out of the situation without endangering Ace's life. So I asked, "Hallie do you have the memories of my past?" And when she nodded, I let the spell fly.

We were both unconscious for the better part of two hours according to Ace who had made started a fire while we were out. The corpse of the other faerie was gone, but curiously, it didn't bother me for long and it was only when Hallie, who had seemingly forgotten the entire earlier experience, pointed out the food in Ace's hands that I realized I was starving. I hadn't eaten all day so I didn't hesitate when he handed me the lump of bread and few scraps of dried meat. He did seem bothered by the fact that Hallie turned them down though so I offered, "she's a spirit so she doesn't eat, but she does feel hunger when I do". It didn't help much from the way his eyebrows quirked and his lips drew downward. Then he asked, "Hallie who is she? I know for certain you don't have a twin". I sighed and suddenly couldn't look at him anymore. "Look at me Hallie. What did you do?" Hallie didn't seem fazed and innocently turned her head to look at him, absently picking at her nails all the while. On the other hand, when I turned to face Ace, there were tears riming my eyes. Though I wasn't exactly sure why, for the first time since making the deal, I felt like I did something wrong. Like I /was/ wrong. It hurt to have someone I loved look at me with such disappointment in their eyes. The feeling was fleeting and gone in less than an instant, though it left me feeling hollow. In that moment, looking at Ace, I cried. Before that moment, I wasn't even sure I could shed tears, you know, with the split soul thing. But, there I was. Except there was no noise. Just burning tears slithering down my cheeks like my body knew I should be crying, but my brain couldn't understand why.

I can't say exactly why I was crying, just that there was an empty pit in my stomach that yawned open every time I looked at him. The boy which the traitorous tears were for must have felt something similar because he was instantly kneeling by my side gently saying, "hey Hallie, it's okay. I don't care what you did. I'm here. I found you. We can go back to Ala now and get married". The tears dried up on contact with those words. /Married/.

"No" I said coldly, "I can't". Ace didn't seem to get it though. "Hallie, we were betrothed. We /have/ to get married". "No" I replied forcefully, "no, you don't seem to understand. I'm not who you think I am. I changed, which is why I'm not going back; I can't go back". I shoved a lock of blonde hair behind my ear and continued louder, "see? Do you see now? I can't possibly go back to Ala, much less get married there". My rounded, stumps that couldn't possibly be called ears seemed to scare him. He jumped up and backed away from me shaking his head. "Do you know how a deal with Magic works, Ace? No? Allow me to enlighten you" I continued growing increasingly more angry, "see in order for someone to get the extra magical power Magic offers, they must give something up. That's what I gave up, Ace, my history, my past, my heritage. I'm not a faerie so Ala is out of the question and Hallie is the only family I have now seeing as how you wouldn't want to be seen with any human shit like me".

Though he seemed a bit frightened by my human ears, looking at them as if he might inherit their curse if he came to close, it was more infuriating that Ace wasn't angry. In fact, what was that I saw in his eyes? Sadness? No, pity was more like it. He said softly, "oh Hallie. You had a brother, a sister". Hallie actually growled to stop him from divulging too much of my past, staring daggers at him at the same time. And that was it, no more discussion of my past. I felt like a little child.