The Darkness Within

Chapter 1 - A Glance Through The Past

Back when I was a little kid I lived in Washington state. I had lots of friends and life was amazing. I was a carefree young kid and I didn't notice all the problems in the world. I didn't know about things such as death and pain. I'd complain about the most simple of things and I would try and help anybody I could. I had some close family friends and my parents had these friends that were like another family to me. As I got older I slowly started noticing more things wrong with the world.

On my sixth birthday, half way through kindergarten, I moved across the country to Virginia. Moving was a new thing to me and I loved the airplane. I got sung to and we landed at Reagan National Airport. I got free candy from the airplane workers and I was still so innocent and carefree. We moved into an apartment and I had to stay in a bland white room. I decorated it with stuffed toys, but that was about it. When I started going to school again that's when I started noticing a few things. I realized that people didn't just welcome you right away. Kids could be cruel, but most of them weren't. The kids that were quickly changed their personalities and became friends of mine. It was still too easy, life was still too easy.

I moved again by the time first grade came around. I had lost all my new friends and was very sad. I got a new room though and got to sleep in my old bed. I used to have pastel pink walls back in Washington, but when I moved again I never painted my walls. I decorated with toys again. I also used bright, colorful things to put around my room. When I started school things were okay, but after a while things started going downhill. On the first day I made some really good friends, and one soon became my best friend. His name was Claude, he was super sweet and really loved bright colors and pink, so he was basically me. He introduced me to a few people that soon became friends of mine. I joined a girl scout troop and most of my friends were in it, like Eve, Lauren, Diana, and Annie. I realized soon enough how mean people could be.

Half way through first grade I got a crush that I still kinda have to this day. His name was Ben. He had amazing black hair and beautiful shiny blue eyes. He was amazing, but I didn't know him personally. Somebody found out I had a crush on him, but I also had another crush. His name was Matthew. We used to sneak out of class and he'd kiss me, sometimes when I didn't want him touching me. He moved during the summer after the school year. The people that figured out I had a crush on him teased me, and bullied me.

In second grade I had made it to stay in the same school. Almost everybody ignored me and treated me cruelly. I had a few friends who were still close to me, like Eve and Claude. Most people were jerks until my birthday came around. They'd ignore me and when my birthday came they acted like we were best friends. I thought they actually were my friends, and I was stupid enough to believe a few people. I had become close friends with my crush. My birthday passed and the year continued on. A few weeks after my birthday my best friend ditched me from somebody else and practically ignored me outside of the classroom.

The summer after second grade was amazing. I didn't know anything was wrong, but I did notice something happened to my mom. She seemed sadder, and it seemed like my whole family was holding a secret that I didn't know. All I knew was that I wanted to hang out with a family member I hadn't seen in a few months, my uncle. I loved my uncle. He was such a nice and amazing person, so naturally I wanted to hang out with him.

In third grade I realized what was going on. I noticed that people were jerks, but I had made two new friends that I always hung out with. Their names were Chris and Sam. We hung out whenever we had the chance and I realized what true friendship was. I loved these guys, but no more then a friend. They were really protective of me because they could see through my fake smile sometimes. All through the past few years everybody asked me for help, but this year was the busiest.

During that summer I asked when my uncle would be visiting again, this was when my mom told me the news... My uncle had died last summer. He died from a blood clot just like my grandfather. That's what I was told at least...

I moved again at the end of the third grade school year and went to a new school for fourth grade. I met some people that were amazing friends of mine. People like Jamie, Ezrith, Julie, and Izzy. The school year went on okay, but some people were total jerks and I had trouble trusting people because of the last school. Ezrith moved at the end of the school year and I hadn't heard from her again.

In fifth grade I moved girl scout troops and made new friends. My best friend was somebody named Nik and I had a close friend name Sammy, but he went by Sam. Sam was really funny and goofy. Nik and Sam became really close friends of mine over the year, but I lost contact with them after the year, which really sucked because they were amazing people.

I moved schools for sixth grade, that makes it six schools in six years, and eight different houses. I made a few new friends like Caden, Kate, Kathy, and Amanda. I made it through the year trying to be popular, but it didn't work. My self conciseness became very low, but I made another new friend named Karmen. Karmen had a crush on me and asked me out, but I turned him down. I felt bad so I told him that I did like him, but I wasn't ready to date yet, so maybe during high school.

I came back into school in seventh grade as 'emo.' I wear all black and dye my hair. People bullied me more and my parents just got worse and worse over the years. This was the year that I found out the Ezrith committed suicide and that my uncle actually died of suicide, and that another relative had. I thought that suicide would be a way out... but I was wrong. My new friends helped to save my life and I'm glad I met them and that I listen to the music I do.

1171 Words.
Sorry for the crappy chapter. Let me know if I should add more details. I got distracted while writing this.