Decay into Madness

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I watched as my family fell into insanity, their carelessness and willingness to follow a hormonal teenage boy in love was both astounding and stupid.

Edward became the leader of the family, his will was unquestioned, simply because the boy fell in love for the first time in all of his hundred years on this planet. It was pathetic. But also kinda cute.

I watched as he exposed us to a human, which is considered a death wish in everyone's eyes but my families.

I watched as he brought her into our home, as she slowly became a part of our lives.

It seemed as everyone had an opinion in the girl.

Edward was obsessed, Esme saw her as another daughter, Emmet as the clumsy sister who should be teased, Charlisle as the perfect match for his favourite child, Alice as a dress up doll, and a partner in mischief.

Then there were we, the three outcast. Rosalie who hated her for the stupidity the girl undoubtedly possessed since she willingly came into a vampire residence, Jasper who worried about losing control and me who simply saw nothing good coming out with the girl's knowlage of our world. It was dangerous to all parties involved.

No one listened to us.

Rosalie went as far as to openly show her dislike for the girl, but nothing seemed to deter the human. If anything, she became more determined to become a part of our family.

I didn't blame the girl herself, for she was in love and young. She didn't even think of us vampires as cursed beings, which made Jasper and me feel a little better. We weren't the only one who thought we are all damned to hell. I actually hoped her opinion may sway Edward's, but no such luck.

The boy continued with his show of a tragic character to whom the world owes everything.

I loved my brother, I truly did, but I couldn't understand his hatred for what he became. Is it such a horrible fate to be immortal, to spend an eternity with the people you love and who love you? Is it such a punishment to bear witness as the world changes? To be a part of that change? According to Edward it is.

Isabella Swan is actually a sweet girl, very brave, kind and selfless. I liked her, but in a soldier's mind she was a liability, and in a vampire's she was temptation.

And as much as I'd like to say that it were not the case, the truth is that I was jealous. Not of her humanity or some other aspect of who she was or what she had, at least not in the general sense of the word. I envied her the love she attracted and gave in return.

I have never felt what it was like, being in love, for as far as I can recall. Even though I remember nothing of my human life, my death being the only exception, I don't believe I loved someone in that time.

The only love I felt is that of a sister, and while it is enough for me, I can't help but wonder what it would be like to love someone in a more romantic and more intimate way. Being an almost two hundred years old virgin was not something that I was proud to admit, not was it something I enjoyed.

So we all went with his madness, sinking deeper down as the days went by, trying to keep the truth away from everyone. It was foolish to think we could do such a thing.

The first problem started when Edward took Isabella to watch a vampire modified baseball game. Now that by itself wouldn't be a problem if we didn't get non-vegetarian guests who decided to play 'Hunt the Human' with our lovely Bella.

We had to run to another town, to try and keep her safe, only for the girl to run off to said vampires when she thought they had her mother, making us actually kill the man responsible.

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