Letter For Myself(NOTE: THIS IS JUST A STORY PLUS TRIGGER WARNING)

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I grown up an achiever but it all changed when I got to college.  I have failing grades, became depressed and confused.  My parents  doesn't  know about this it's like a lot of things happened and I became lost on my own way.  Recently,  I found out that mom is having an affair. I don't  know how to handle myself anymore.  I am screaming for help but where?  Nobody is there and all I got is some stupid fake fb account and this account.  I became the black sheep of my family. Don't get me wrong I don't  do drugs or anything it's just that I can't even go to a dean's list. It's so funny that yesterday they were complimenting me and now it's like I'm  a trash :). I am doing everything to get back on track but I don't  know I am getting tired every single day like I don't  even love my hobby anymore.  Nothing cheers me up.