Endless War (Complete)

Chapter 29 "Sebastian"

I fear coming out of the system, I am afraid of what I will wake up to. Am I being raped by Josh, did the system stop him? I feel sick to my stomach. I slowly regain feeling in my body, I can feel arms wrapped around me and a warm body is pressed against my side, once again, an obviously male body. I try to scream, but I haven't regained the use of my voice. I must have been in deep. I concentrate on the body next to me and push it away with my mind.

The body moves, and I picture a knife at his throat. I want him dead, but at the same time I need his help. I see that I am already redressed, I can't keep myself from sobbing as I slowly dig the invisible knife in deeper.

I hear a familiar voice, but it is strained. "Phoenix, please it's Grim."

I release the tension and look over toward the man and sure enough it is Grim. "How did you get here?"

"My mother told me what you were up to. I had to come. When I got close I heard you calling out to me but not out loud, just in my head. I found you here, you were un-conscious, and that ass hole was about to... and I... well I killed him. Living up to the name I gave you, I suppose." He sits up rubbing his neck. He pulls his hand away and there is a small amount of blood there.

I think that every time my mind diverted to Grim when I was in the system, must have been me calling out to him. I don't know how, but I don't understand half of the things that I am capable of, I just do them. My mind quickly darts to the present and I think of cutting him with my mind. "I am sorry. I thought you were him."

"It's ok. I figured as much." He reaches out to embrace me, and I let him.

Tears flood my eyes, "Th-thankyou, Sebastian, I don't know what I would have done, had he..."

Grim cuts me off. "He didn't, that is all that matters. You are safe." He rests his chin on my shoulder, I feel the warmth his breath before he inhales deeply.

For once in my very short life, enveloped in his embrace, I feel safe. Safe from everything, safe from the fallen who are really human, safe from the memories of the cells that enforced the captivity of my childhood, and the killing of innocents. All of it, goes away when I breath in his scent. I start to unbutton my blouse, as I read his thoughts.

"No." He places his hand over my own.

"But you..." Again I am cut off.

"Always, I am a man after all, but that doesn't mean I have to give in. Just hearing you say my name, without the joking or sarcasm, well it felt nice. I would never take advantage of you like that. You are vulnerable, I would never do anything to hurt you." His hold on me tightens.

"But." I again tempt to speak.

"Shhh, don't worry. All I want to do right now, is to hold you in my arms. I love you too, you know." He whispers softly into my ear.

"I asked her to wait." I look up into his eyes.

He chuckles, "My mother never listens where matters of the heart are in play. Hell, she just never listens, period." He did his best imitation of his mothers voice, making sure to include the hand jesters as well.

"I do, though." I reply.

"What?" He looks down at me, wrapping his legs around me an pulling me back to lay on his chest as he leans on the side of the wall.

"Love you." I turn back to look at him again.

He leans in, I believe he wishes to kiss until he moves upwards landing a kiss on my nose. "I know."

"So, I am not just a robot to you anymore?" I question.

"No Phoenix, you are not just a robot, you are the robot that this sickly green alien loves." He laughs, and I just breath him in. "I am still mad that you just left me back there though."

"I figured you didn't want me around. The way you reacted when I told you about your mother. I didn't mean to make you angry." I feel pressure on my chest as I think of the way he stormed off into the cavern.

He lets out a heavy breath before speaking. "I wasn't angry with you for telling me, I was angry that you just blurted it out. I was angry with my mother for never telling me. I took out my anger on you by saying all the cruel things that I said. I have learned through observation and our conversations, that you are so much more than the hardware that is in your head." He raises his hand and lightly taps me on the back of my neck.

"Your mother didn't know." I am sure he can since the sorrow in my voice.

He places his hands on my shoulders and starts to rub them. "I know that now, I am glad you got there to talk to her before I managed to find her. If I had stormed in making accusations before she even knew... Well it would have ended badly and I would have hurt her. When I walked up to her, she was already apologizing for not telling me, confessing that she never knew."

I can feel the sorrow in his mind and know there are tears streaming down his cheeks, without turning to look. "Thank you, for being so kind and gentle with her. I know that those chips in your head make you say things without thinking how they will affect the person you are speaking to. I know that, and I shouldn't have blamed you."

"I can take the blame a little." I confess. "The sun is gone, we should start making our way inside the structure."