(Un)Determined [Nico x Suicidal Male Reader]

Chapter One;

I've always known exactly who I am.
But will I tell you? No, this one you'll have to figure out for yourself.

***

When I wake, it's to the calming sound of trees rustling above me in the wind, and for a moment I wonder how I got here before I remember.
The night before had been rough, I'd been running from a few weird looking monsters, they sort of looked like chickens but...a lot scarier.
They hadn't even appeared before I'd entered the forest but as soon as I'd stepped foot inside they'd practically appeared out of thin air before me, howling and screeching as I ran deeper into the woods.

I'm sure I'm close, I'd heard monsters whispering recently, murmuring things about a camp hidden around a strawberry field.
Yesterday, before I started running here, a group of around six cyclopses attacked my grade ten field trip to check out a few floors of the Empire State Building. Of course, that got interrupted pretty quick.
I'd been actually behaving for once, looking around in curiosity at the enormous building in awe, appreciating the hard work put into building it and basking in the strange powerful aura that bathed the vicinity.

And my peace was interrupted by a fake janitor and his Five messy buddies when they started hurtling brooms at my head.
I was not about to go to my foster home today, I know for sure they would hear about how much damage those cyclopses caused and somehow, someone would blame me. They broke an enormous hole into the wall, blew up the secretaries desk, and cracked the ceiling. Thankfully we were on the bottom floor listening to Mr. Brendt's speech about behaving.
In between them throwing cleaning objects at me and me trying to attack them with the pocket knife I had, I could see them looking anxiously at the buildings ceiling, like they were worried about someone or something in the many floors above our heads.

They gave up and ran away about ten minutes after they attacked me, murmuring things in a language I shouldn't have known but did. They'd said,
"We must leave lest we get the attention of this ones parent or the rest."
And they'd ran off with barely even a scratch. A week or so before that I'd been attacked by weird creatures that had saw like teeth practically growing out of their mouths.
They'd attacked me on my way home after school, several of them murmured things about a camp for kids like me. Of course, they'd threatened I'd never survive the trip to the strawberry field.
That was the only clue I had about this camp, and I don't know what they meant by kids like me. I have dyslexia and ADHD, which resulted in poor grades. Except in art, the only class I ever maintained an average of 90 or higher in out of all of my subjects.

But the only strawberry field I knew of was the one on the other side of this forest, I couldn't afford to drive there, and I was never going to ask my abusive foster parents to give me a lift. They'd never liked me, and I know they're furious that I ran away. There's no way I'm going back to a beating. The last time I'd seen them they had broken my nose and bruised a good portion of my torso with their kicks and hits, screaming that I was a good for nothing kid who took them for granted.

This camp, with whoever is in it, is my last chance. If they won't let me in, I have nowhere else to go.

Remembering the camp stirred me faster through the trees, but something kept making me uncomfortable, I felt like I was being watched, or followed, and my heart picked up as I realized something.
Those monsters, they were all Greek, I know this. But they were the ones who said I could enter this camp. A camp that had other people like me.
Maybe it wasn't mentally challenged that they had meant but a child who has a Greek god for a parent and a mortal for their other parent.

My heart pounded in my chest so hard that I had trouble breathing or hearing. And I could feel hope-real, powerful hope-grip my brain and it seeped it's contagious liquid into my heart and it infected it.
Maybe this could be a place where I could belong, even if I'm gay. But then, it isn't like anyone has to know that.
"Listen child, never tell anyone who your parent is. You do not want anyone to know."
The words reminded me, they weren't anything but a memory, but I remember my mom telling me this before she died. She had told me that people would mistrust me if they knew who my godly parent was, or that they would think I was insane.

My hope dampened and turned sour in my chest and I stopped. The trees had begun thinning, and I was worried that I was almost there.
It's surprising how quickly hope can expire, isn't it?

What if I was asked who my parent was? Would they be able to tell if I'm lying? Would they punish me if they found out?

My thoughts weighed me down, and I heard and felt a small splash as I stepped in a puddle, and I stared down at myself.
My (h/c) hair had leaves and twigs in it, and my (e/c) eyes looked troubled and scared. I laughed without humour, and surged onward. Whatever happens, I'll just do my best to keep my secret, and if I get in trouble....well, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

Before I could dramatically step through the last of the trees, a monstrous roar jolted through my bones, my heart sped up in anxiety, and I didn't dare turn for fear of making it attack.
The air rumbled with its menacing growl, and I tried to figure out what it was, it sounded like an enormous dog.

It let loose an angry bark and I took off in a sprint, knowing I had no way to fight it off and when I made it through the trees, I didn't have a chance to take in the sight, all I saw were a few dozen people in similar clothes with orange shirts turn and yelling, drawing weapons, before I fell, the weight of an enormous dog shoving me into the dirt, I felt it bite into my arm, and I screamed in pain, struggling, before it collapsed on top of me a few moments later, dead, with arrows protruding from its skull like a demented pin cushion.

I felt the blood seeping slowly out of me as teenagers my age or older rushed to me, some were yelling to the others and some were saying things to me, but I couldn't hear any of it through the ringing and cotton balls in my ears. It was a hellhound, I realize right before I faint.