First Love // JIKOOK [not continuing anymore]

Chapter 2

I Need U

Jimin's POV

After hours in the plane I finally landed in my home, South Korea. My parents live in Seoul now so I don't really go back to my hometown, since my hometown is Busan. I light the cigarette that I bought from the convenience store, as I inhale and exhale the smoke I feel like my problems have been washed away. Namjoon hyung always told me that I've become an addict towards nicotine, but I told him I'm not since I don't smoke everyday.

I was sitting on a bench, not calling my parents to pick me up. I closed my eyes as I finished the cigarette I had until my phone started ringing.

Lisa Montana
Accept | Decline

I stopped breathing, is she mad at me? I still love her, I need her also, but my parents need me as well. Please wait for me Lisa, I'll come back to the States to be with you again.

Accept

"Hi" I breathed heavily "Jimin?" Lisa said as I she sniffled. She's crying, I'm sorry for making you cry Lisa. "Yes Lisa? Why'd you call me? This is a very expensive call you know" I tried to lighten the mood "I'm sorry" she started sobbing "Wh-why?" I stuttered "I cheated on you" she cried harder "We aren't together anymore Lisa" I softly say, trying to comfort her and ignoring the pain in my heart.

"No Jimin, I cheated on you while we were together. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it, I thought I should just tell you" she cried harder.

I can't breathe.

Take me away now.

Why did you do it Lisa?

Why?

"Why? Why did you do it?" I tried to hold back my tears "I got drunk with my friends, then I woke up with a man who I don't even know" she cried "You cheated on me? I loved you for 6 years Lisa! Can't you even control yourself?" tears spilled from my eyes.

The pain is just too much.

"I was drunk Jimin!" Lisa yelled "So? You will still be aware of the actions you do!" I yelled back "I'm sorry" she softly says "I really didn't mean it to go that way, I loved you" she cried "Lisa" I sighed "I love you" I say to her "It's okay Lisa, I understand that you didn't mean it. I love you, okay? Please wait for me, I'll be back there and we will be together again. I'm sorry that I had to leave, but remember that I still love you" I smiled to myself.

"But I don't love you anymore Jimin" she says "What?" I feel like I'm dying "I don't love you anymore Jimin. You didn't even stay for me, you didn't even try to have a long distance relationship instead you decided to break up with me. You expect me to still love you when you did that?" Lisa rambled "I'm sorry that I still love you." that was the last thing I said before I ended the call.

"Go clean yourself Jimin, be downstairs for dinner" eomma kisses my forehead and pushes me towards the stairs. I filled the bathtub up and got out my clothes then placed them on my bed.

I decided to give Namjoon a call on FaceTime "Hey Jimin" he says as I hear him eat chips "Hey Namjoon" I sighed "Your giving me that sad tone again, what's wrong bud?"

"Lisa cheated on me while we together" I started to cry. I was already in the tub while I started calling Namjoon. "What?" Namjoon yelled "I still love her Namjoon, please help me to make her fall in love with me again" I cried harder "Jimin, are you dumb?" he asks out of frustration "Namjoon I still love her! I don't care what will happen to me, I just need her back!" I yelled as I sinked into the tub

"Jimin, you'll just get hurt more. Even if you still love and need her, you need to let her go. You can't just go back to the person who hurt you" Namjoon softly says as I put him in speaker phone, I placed my phone on the stool next to me. "But I love her" I cried "So? Don't be dumb Jimin, you know that she'll just hurt you more" he tells me

"I'm done" I yelled "I'm so done with this" I sarcastically laughed "Jimin? What are you doing? Don't do anything dumb!" Namjoon yells. "I don't even care anymore. The person who I love and care about hates me, she left me. I'm the one who broke up with her but it feels like she's the one who left me!" I yelled "Jimin don't be dumb!" Namjoon yelled "I don't even care" I softly say as I sink further into the tub, drowning myself.

Sooner or later my parents came in the bathroom and pulled me out of the tub. "Why are you doing this?!" eomma hugs me "I'm sorry" I cried "Namjoon called us" appa stroked my head "Were you really going to kill yourself?" eomma looks at me with worried eyes "No? Yes? Maybe? I don't know. I held my breath when I sinked into the tub. I wanted to die but I just can't, maybe it was because of Namjoon" I said all in one breath "Calm down Jimin" appa patted my back "I want to die, but I don't know why I can't kill myself. The person who loves me truly left me, I'm the on who broke up with her but it feels like she's the one who left me" I repeated what I said to Namjoon a while ago

"Jimin-ah, listen to me. Love isn't only meant for two partners, it can be between friends. Namjoon has been with you since you were in 2nd grade. He cares about you and treats you like his little brother, he took care of you when you went to the States." eomma hugs me "Please don't do this, okay? Think about your friends, think about Namjoon. You don't need thousands of people caring for you if they will end up just being fake. It's better to have one real person who will care for you, and that's Namjoon" appa lectures me "Okay" I softly say "Get dressed, we will eat dinner soon" they both kiss my head.

Last time, my parents were making fun of Lisa and basically bullying me. Now they become nice and loving? They have serious problems.

"So Jimin, you planning on starting a business?" appa asks me "Yes, I want to open a small café for now." I smile "Café? That will be great Jimin!" eomma squeals "It will" I laugh "Okay, I will support it. But first, explain why you have this?" appa puts the box of cigarettes on the table.

Shit.

"That's not mine" I sipped my water "Really? It was in your bag Jimin! Why are you smoking?! Are you turning into some drug addict now?!" appa yelled as he stood up "Yeobo, calm down" eomma holds appa's arm "Shut up!" appa yells and accidentally hits eomma on the face "Appa!" I yelled "Apologize to eomma! How dare you hit her?!" I yelled as I clenched my fist "Explain" my dad furiously says "I only smoke when I'm stressed!" I yelled at him

"You think you have the right to smoke?!" appa grabs me "I'm not a kid anymore! I can do whatever the fuck I want!" I yell at him "You live under my roof Park Jimin!" appa hits my face and I could hear my mom scream "Jae! Stop hurting our son!" eomma cried "Shut up!" appa kicks eomma.

Since when did he become abusive?

"Fuck you!" I punched my dad repeatedly "Jae get out! Get the fuck out of my house!" eomma grabs my dad and pushes him towards the door

"I'm sorry for your father" eomma cries "Since when did he become like this?" I ask "Remember when your halmoni died? Your appa's eomma? He started to become short tempered and abusive since then" Eomma explains "Waeyo?" I asked again "He can't move on from the death of his mom. Just let him be, go upstair and get some rest." eomma hugs me "A-arraseo" I stuttered as I grab the box of cigarettes and run to my room.

I'm standing at the balcony of my room, my 3rd cigarette between my fingers. I guess I just have to smoke my problems away.

"What is this life?" I sighed

"My life just collapsed in a second. My life collapsed when Lisa left me" my heart hurts

"Why do you still make me love you Lisa?" I finished my 3rd cigarette and lit my 4th cigarette.

"I know I will still get hurt, I'm aware that I will just be dumb if I go back to you. But I still love and need you." I sighed

"Why?" I look up at the starry sky.

"Can I just be a kid again? When everything was okay and happy. Why do I have to grow up? I want to be a kid again, I don't want this hard life anymore" I inhaled the bad smoke.

A/N so this chapter basically shows how his life went crashing down ever since he left America and Lisa left him. Even if he knows he'll get hurt he still loves Lisa and wants to be with her again.

Jimin's dad became abusive because he can't move on from the death of his mother. He results to violence when he gets mad.