No More Mrs.Nice girl

And even I thought it was over

   "Yes Natalia, he asked me to marry him... How many times do I have to say this." My friend stares at me with her mouth gaped open. I still remember how the conversation went with James. 

   "Will you marry me Vivianne Anne Summers? You are the love of my life and I hereby promise to be devoted to only you. I never want to lose you, the thought of it makes me want to die. So please, let me love you the best way that I can?" I looked him in the eye, but when I opened my mouth to speak, nothing came out. I stood up from where I sat on the tile floor and continued to stare at him. I really wanted to say something, but I can't manage to say anything. 
   There were so many things that were going through my head. AND NOT GOOD ONES.

   "Vivianne, what's the matter babe, answer me.?" He said confused. I mean I was confused myself. Then I thought about it, he only asked me to marry him, because I was planning on leaving him. So I did what any sane person would do. 

   "Let me think about it..." He stood up slowly, with a look of disbelief of course, and nodded. He leaned down and kissed my cheek.

   "Honestly Natalia, I'm not totally convinced that he actually wants to marry me. When you get proposed to, it's supposed to feel special, It's supposed to feel like someone has just knocked the wind out of your chest... With James, I felt disgust." She just looks at me as I explain to her.

   After the incident with my secretary and James, I got a new secretary, that's Natalia. She's a really sweet girl, and so innocent. James tried to put the moves on her one time, and she kneed him in the groin. I guess you can say he learned his lesson that day. So now she's been my best friend ever since. 

   "Listen Viv, I honestly don't know why you're still with him. He's a self centered, disgusting, dirty pig... You deserve better. " she smiles. Natalia is about 5 years younger than me, that would make her twenty-five.

   Her birthday was yesterday, and she honestly is really beautiful. She has smooth ebony skin, and high cheek bones. So when she smiles her eyes kind of close. Her hair, like mine is long, except mine stays pretty much straight.

   Natalia's is always really curly and smooth. Natalia has had more racial encounters living in Lexington-Fayette, Kentucky than she has in her own town. Natalia goes on and on about how she doesn't care that she's African American and the racial aggression doesn't matter to her, but deep down I know it does.

   Neither one of us was raised to hate colored skin. Natalia jokes about it, but I don't know the first thing about racism, because even though I'm African American as well, I'm also Caucasian. As well as many other races. I have really light skin, so I've never had to struggle for anything; But I feel for her...

   I appreciate her so much, and I have to stop myself from strangling people whenever they make racist comments towards her sometimes. 

   "Natalia, thank you. I tell you this everyday, but you're a beautiful. Any man would be happy to have you and I promise you that..." I smile at her. The waitress comes over with the check, and I quickly take it. Natalia always tries to pay the bill, and gets really upset whenever I pay it. I tell her time and time again that it's perfectly fine. I'm not bothered at all. 

   "Alright so what are you going to do now!? Well I mean about the James situation?"  We stand up to leave, and just as I'm about to respond to her, hot coffee is spilled all over my blouse. I'd be mad at whoever spilled this hot ass coffee all over me, but I'm too busy trying not to get third degree burns. I don't register anything that anyone is saying. The only thing that is going through my mind right now, is getting this blouse off now.