strong || n.h. (COMPLETED)

{42} regrets

Ariana's POV

I woke up in somewhere not familiar at all. All I had to do was look around and take a deep breath, to know I was in Niall's room.

I sighed and got up, making my way into the kitchen. Sarah was already in there, making her coffee, on the phone with someone.

"Yes, Louis. She's here." Sarah looked up and smiled at me.

"No Louis she's not. How's Niall?"

"Awe, no I won't tell her. Okay, love you bye." She hung up the phone and looked up at me again.

"Won't tell me what?"

"I wasn't talking about you."

"Seriously Sarah, what is it?"

She sighed, "Louis just said that Niall is sort of a mess and he didn't want me to tell you and make you feel bad." she babbled.

I just looked down. He's a mess because of me? I feel terrible, I thought it was what's best for our relationship.

My phone rang. The called I.D. said Harry.

I picked it up, even half of me wanted to and half of me didn't.

"Hey Ari."

"Hey Harry. Is everything okay?"

"With me, yes. Niall, no."

"Who are you talking to?" I heard Niall say in the background. I instantly felt bad because of how broken he sounded.

"Um, Ariana." I heard weeping and a door slam.

"Oh my god, what have I done." I whispered, starting to cry.

"It's fine Ariana, you did what's best for you and your relationship-"

"Harry I don't know why I did it! I could've been with him right now, everyone would be happy, including me! I miss him and all of you so much. I freaking slept in his bed because it reminded me of him." I yelled into the phone, sobbing.

"We'll be home in a couple of months, everything will be fine."

I sighed, "They will be the longest months of my life."

"I gotta go, talk to you later."

"Bye." I said weakly and hung up.

Sarah gave me a sympathetic look and I immediately crashed into her and cried into her shoulder.

"It's okay. It's okay." she said over and over.

"No it's not, Niall's hurting and so am I so what's the point of leaving him? I'm so stupid. Maybe you should skype him or something." I nodded and pulled away from Sarah.

I made my breakfast and sat down, opening twitter.

@narianagoran: OMFG WHY DID SHE LEAVE?!

How do they know, already?

@lovingniallhoranxx: She hurt him, so I will hurt her.

Well that's not scary at all.

@arianaisthebae: There must've been a reason, Ari is so sweet!

No she's a mistake-making, stupid girl. I thought to myself.

@HatingAriana: That bitch hurt Niall, what the hell is wrong with her.

@ewnariana: I was fine with the relationship. If Niall's happy, I'm happy. But when Niall isn't happy, I will strangle the ugly bitch who made him sad. End of story.

I started crying, then. I couldn't hold them in anymore.

@ArianaGrande: Do you really think Niall is the only one hurting right now? I made a mistake and I'm sorry but I can't go back and change it. I thought it would be best to leave him but it wasn't. So please stop hating on me because I can't take it. I'm already hurting enough without being called 'the ugly bitch who hurt our Niall'.

I pressed send and all of the fan pages for 'Nariana Goran' retweeted or favorited it. But there was still some hate, although there was a lot less.

I put my phone down and put my bowl in the dish washer, sitting down on the couch. My phone beeped and I swear my heart skipped a beat when I saw it.

@NiallOfficial: Leave @ArianaGrande alone. Thanks.

I smiled but it was almost a sad smile. Niall is always so happy in his tweets. In this one he was so serious, it was so unlike him. And I couldn't help but think it is my fault.

Because it is.

I decided to be brave and text him.

To Niall:

Hey... how are you doing? I'm sorry again for leaving. I thought it would be best to have some time apart. But we are both a mess.

I took a deep breath and pressed send. My breath hitched as a text appeared on my screen almost a minute later.

I held my breath as I unlocked my phone to read it.

From Niall:

I'm fine.

I sighed in defeat. What have I done to him? I shouldn't have left. If I didn't, Niall and I would be happily together.

I made a huge mistake and I regret it more than anything I've ever done.

When I see him again, I hope he doesn't have another girlfriend, but I also want him to be happy. He told me he'd wait for me and I told him not too, which is also something I regret.

Niall Horan,

I still love you.