Unthinkable

Chapter 1

"Elaina! Wake up! It's finally the day!" My mom yelled at me as she pounded on my bedroom door.

For a minute I didn't know what she meant, then I remembered. Today is the day I finally get to see one direction in concert!

In late 2010 when Simon made Them a band on the X-Factor, my brother, Sam, had just recently died in the army. Sam was my best friend. We literally did everything together, we were 5 years apart but we still had a really good relationship. But when General Thompson showed up at our house to tell us about the 17 soldiers blown up by a grenade, everyone in my family fell apart. My dad filed for divorce with my mom a year later because she had a nervous breakdown after losing Sam. I tried to keep everything together and act like it was okay when it really wasn't. I had certain thoughts about self harm and running away. But My best friend Jessica was always there for me and one day when I was at her house she played the album "Up all Night" by one direction. She had always had this weird obsession with One Direction and I never understood why until that moment. I suddenly became a full on directioner because they pulled me out of a place I thought there was no escaping. They gave me hope when I most needed it. And I used to think it was sort of a clichéd comment from directioners when they said "you saved my life", but they truly did save mine and I'm so grateful for that.

I got up and got ready for the concert. It was finally the day they came to my home town, Seattle Washington. I couldn't believe this was happening. I put on my British flag tank top and my American eagle shorts. I just got these new white Converse Chuck Taylor high tops for my birthday so I decide to wear those. I called Jessica and asked what she was going to wear.

"OH MY GOD JESSICA CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE IT!? TODAY IS THE DAY!" I screamed In her ear when she answered the phone.

"I know I know! Save your loud voice for tonight though okay, Lainey?" She replied laughing.

"Ha ha, sorry."

"So, what is Mrs. Horan wearing tonight?" Jess teased me.

"Oh stop it! I think the more important question is what is Mrs. Payne wearing tonight?" I teased her back.

"Glad you asked. Just a British flag shirt with shorts and white converse." She replied.

"Oh my god you copy cat!" I said laughing.

"How do I know you didn't copy me?" Jess replied jokingly.

"Yeah good point. Well I must be going, I have to finish writing my Niall boo a letter. Don't forget to write Liam one!" I said.

"Oh how could I ever forget! See you at 2 Lainey." Jess said.

I hung up the phone and went down stairs for breakfast. My mom was cooking me pancakes.

"So, are you excited!?" My mom asked as I sat down at the table.

"Are you kidding me!? I'm beyond excited mom!"

My mom is the reason all this happened. Ever since my dad left us, my mom works 2 jobs to pay for our little house on the outskirts of Seattle. I love my mom to death but I feel really sorry for her sometimes. She lost her son then my dad walked out on her so now it's just me and her. She got me and Jess front row tickets for my birthday. When I opened it I almost lost it.

"I can't believe you and Jess are already 17." My mom said as she looked at me with her yellow apron on. She started to tear up. She gets emotional a lot because of what's happened to her in the past couple of years. I got up from the table and gave her a big hug.

"I know. Me either, mom." I said.

"I hope you have an amazing day Elaina" my mom said.

"I will mom, thank you so much."

I ate my pancakes and went upstairs and started writing a letter to Niall.

"Dear Niall,

I'm not sure if you will even read this, but I hope you do. My name is Elaina Peters and I'm a regular 17 year old girl from Seattle Washington. I have been through a really tough time in my life and I was really close to hurting myself if not worse. But when your album "Up all night" came out my best friend Jessica played it for me and I immediately fell in love. Louis showed me that it's okay to have a good laugh. Liam showed me it's okay to be serious when needed. Harry showed me to just have fun and express who I am. Zayn showed me to really appreciate what I have while I have it. But most importantly, you showed me that no matter what hard times we may be going through, hurting or killing yourself is never the answer because that would be a selfish thing to do and I'm worth way more than I think. I know if you do read this you will probably feel sorry for me, throw the letter away, then never think about me again and go on with your life. But I just wanted you to know that you saved me and I love you."

-Elaina