One Direction One Shots | Niall-centric

Little Ray // niam

Losing a child is the hardest thing any parent will have to go through.

Losing a child that you've tried 2 years for before you've even had the chance to meet them, to bond with them, is hard.

Niall and Liam, know that pain. They know the pain that comes with being so happy that you're going to have a family only for it be snatched away at the very last minute. They know the pain of having to go through labour that should be rewarded with a shrill cry but instead are met with the harsh sound of silence. They know the pain of walking into a maternity ward ready to have a baby only to walk out empty handed.

They lived with that pain - that storm - for a year before a little light shone through and they were granted with a rainbow.

They hadn't been trying much. There were many times where the thought of getting pregnant and going through all of that again were just too much to bare. But sometimes the thought of having another go - of the same thing not possibly happening again, overwhelmed it.

And so, after a little while of Niall, not feeling well, he took a pregnancy test and there it was. Pregnant. They were going to have another baby. They were going to get another chance.

Throughout the entire pregnancy of course they were happy but they were worried too. Worried that the same thing was going to happen and so as the week that they lost their little one last time approached, their nerves increased tenfold. But then, at 37+3 weeks, Niall went into labour.

He'd coped with the first stage of labour well, the beginning contractions not strong enough to stop him talking and needing pain relief. But as the hours drew on, so did the increase in contractions and Niall's pain threshold was starting to falter. After a phone call to the maternity unit, they were invited in and the first thing Niall demanded once he'd stepped foot in the room was pain relief. He didn't care what it was he just need something to take the edge off. The midwife looking after them, for the evening, Sarah, offered him entonox and he took the mouthpiece with a grateful smile.

"You're breathing through your contractions, brilliantly, Niall." She complimented, flicking through the notes they'd found of his. Once his current contraction ended, she spoke up, "so, I see from your notes that you're due to be induced next week as you've had a previous stillbirth. I'm so sorry to hear that."

The couple looked, at each other with a sad smile, Liam, who was sat on the chair next to Niall's bed, spoke up, "Yeah, it was, um, last year. Everything was fine and then at 38 weeks, Niall, said he hadn't felt her move as much so we went to get him checked out and— and she was gone."

Sarah, looked sympathetic as she listened, "That must've been awful. I can't imagine all the thoughts that must've been going through your minds."

"Yeah it was tough, we didn't understand why it happened or what we did to deserve it but, it obviously happened for a reason.."

"But that's why I was meant to be getting induced next week, because that's the same gestation as I was last time." Niall, explained, gripping Liam's hand as another contraction overtook him.

Niall's labour went on throughout the night; him going from 3 to 5 to 7cm within a few hours. He couldn't take the pressure of lying on the bed anymore and found more relief in standing against it, rocking from side to side whilst Liam, rubbed his back, Sarah, watching his CTG monitor from the corner. One particular contraction had him crying out, knees buckling from the strength of it, "Fuck, that hurts."

Liam, held onto his waist, as he soothed him, "I know babe, but you're doing so well. Only 3 more centimetres and then we'll have our baby yeah?"

Niall nodded with a whimper, as contractions continued to assault him. After the contractions seemed to let up, Sarah decided to examine him again, "You're 9cm now, Niall!" She chirped, washing her hands in the sink in the corner.