greenflame // I'm okay

t h i r t e e n

Request: AngiePresto14

WARNING: has scenes of cutting, you've been warned

Lloyd

~Flashback~

I've been recovering a bit.  But not a lot really, I still fake it.  Faking it is really my only option, the way I see it.  I still have that dark thought and voice in my head that's breaking me down, but I try to ignore it.

I looked at myself in the mirror.  This is not worth it.  Let me heal the pain..

"Don't do it...don't do it...don't do it..."  I mumbled under my breath.  It was all too easy.  The razor was right there.  Right in front of my hand.  I could help ease the pain, by adding more pain.  But a more pleasurable pain.

I hesitantly picked up the razor and looked at it.  I then thought of Kai.  My lips curled downward into a frown.  If I do this, what will Kai say?  I told him I would stop.  That I wouldn't do it anymore.  But it's so tempting!

I glanced behind me cautiously.  I turned back around and sighed, gripping the razor tightly.

That's it.  There's no going back now..This will help.

I took the razor and gently placed it on my wrist.  I then traced it down my arm slowly as I felt tears roll down my face.  I winced.  Why do I do this to myself?

Once I was satisfied by the cut, I tried putting the razor away but it accidentally slipped from my grasp.  It fell to the floor and almost hit my foot.

"Shit!" I cursed a bit too loudly as I swiftly moved my foot away before the razor hit it.  I groaned and picked it up and placed it back properly.

"Fucking razor.." I muttered quietly as I cleaned the cut with water so I don't get infected.

I then heard a loud knock on my door which made me jump in surprise.  I went to go get it.  It was Master Wu.

"Yes Master?"

"Come on, you have a mission to go on."

Really??  At this time??

"What is it?"

"A bank robbery."

"Oh that's nothing..Just give me a second and I'll go right away."  I sighed and was about to turn away to get my stuff before he stopped me once again.  "Oh and Lloyd.  What were you doing in there?  You don't really curse unless something is really troubling you."

I nervously laughed.  "Oh yeah.. I j-just slipped o-on a b-book that I left on my floor.  It w-was nothing really.."

"Oh....okay.."  He said, looking at me suspiciously.

Once he exited and went downstairs, I let out a sigh of relief.

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so sorry its extremely short and really lazy writing

and plz keep requesting things unless you dont want to...

UPDATES SOON