naive | ben tyler cook

✦ twenty-one ✦

( sunday, april 15, 2018 )

•

rylee adjusted the camera on her vanity once she was back inside her dressing room, sitting in the middle of the frame on her spinny-chair.

"alright, broadway.com," she began, hugging her knees to her chest, "i hope everyone enjoyed the very first episode of 'too grool for school.' i really enjoyed getting to film everything for you guys. i never knew that being in front of a camera was that exciting."

she giggled somewhat at her own words before signing off. "see ya next week!"

rylee reached forward to turn off the camera and put it securely back into its case. she had previously gone to the stage-door, so she grabbed her backpack and slid into a jacket before leaving the theater.

she was halfway down the block when she heard her name being called. rylee stopped in her tracks and spun around to see ben running down the sidewalk. she grinned widely, her stomach flipping upside down as she landed her eyes on his. they were lit up brightly by the neon signs from the buildings around them. rylee shivered in the cool air of new york city, mostly in response to the bonfire erupting her chest.

ben slung his arm over her shoulders and fell into pace with her. "ya heading home?" he inquired, his side pressing into hers.

rylee felt like gasping, but held her breath instead. "yeah. why?"

he looked down at her, due to the slightest bit of height between them. ben gave her that prize-winning smile. his lips lifted gently into his cheek, barely creating that ripple effect in his cheekbones. his eyes shined against hers, and she admired them. something she'd always done. 

rylee fell into his gaze as they slowed down, the wind whipping her hair all over her face. ben turned to face her completely, but she gained consciousness and unwrapped her arm from around his torso. she used the excuse that her hair was in her face- which it was- to step away from him and adjust it.

he stuck his hands in his pockets, rocking on his heels as she pulled her hair into a ponytail.

"well, uh," ben cleared his throat, "i was gonna ask if you wanted to come back to the apartment with me. see josh and dan again, maybe watch a movie. we have the day off tomorrow, so you could stay over, if ya wanted to. you still have some clothes left over from last time that i washed and forgot to give back."

"and i still have your hoodie," rylee laughed, feeling the tension that she had created with her stiff shoulders break by her own words. "i'm sorry about that."

"don't apologize," he chuckled and squeezed her shoulder. "so?"

rylee pondered the invitation. go to ben's and feel distraught because you're legitimately falling in love with your best friend because you're a hormonal twenty-something year old who has only kissed one person in their lifetime and ben is the only attention you've gotten from a guy in awhile.

was that it? was she just lonely? maybe she should've taken up kyle's offer on the date. gosh, she thought, you really need to think things through more.

she set this idea into her mind- that she was only falling in love with ben because he was giving her attention and she had emotional detachment disorder- and accepted his invite. ben turned their path around, as his apartment was in the other direction, and looped his arm through hers.

they walked in silence, that was filled by the nightly noises from new york city. music from the many bars they crossed, karaoke of don't stop believing and bad renditions of adele. hot dogs and beer and gasoline that was spilled on the street, wafting past their noses. leftover rain water splashing beneath their feet from puddles.

she looked down as they passed each one, examining their stance. it was like they were a couple, showing pda between the two of them. she liked it. at least the thought of it? at least the thought of ben holding her on display.

which was it?

this entire thing was way too confusing. but tonight she was going to force herself to not think about it. though she knew she would at least once, she painted over it with a different idea. rylee looked down in another puddle and saw two best friends on their way to the ones apartment to have a great time as best friends.

still, rylee couldn't stop thinking about her feelings for ben. were they genuine? or was she just a struggling romantic? she would get to the bottom of it as she soon as she got home the next day.

•

but, curled up on her own couch with ben's aforementioned hoodie scrunched up over her pajama bottoms, rylee swiped a few stress tears from her eye bags.

why was this so hard? the movies make it look so easy. think he's cute? get butterflies? bam! you're in love. bottom line. no fees or regulations. just love.

after many arguments in her mind, in which she was whispering either sides points, rylee picked up her phone and opened her text messages.

•

kyle selig

rylee west hey! i was wondering if you would still be up to going on a date?

kyle selig rylee, you do remember why i asked you, right?

rylee west yeah, but i do need to get myself back out there. and if you're inclined, i would like to go out with you.

kyle selig i suppose there's no harm or foul in going out.
when?

rylee west tonight. meet me at the park and bring a hoodie.
or two. i have a thing for stealing hoodies 😜

kyle selig i'll see you around seven, then? 😂

rylee west 6. and don't be late!

•

rylee smiled contentedly to herself, pulling ben's hoodie up her torso and over her head. she tossed it into her laundry pile and sent her last message to kyle.