I'm Totally Original

Chapter One

*My first ever story on Wattpad and it's some dumb parody thing.*

Chapter 1:

*BEEP BEEP BEEP*

My alarm is so stupid. I thought as I got out of my queen sized bed pushing my big fluffy blanket aside.

"GET THE FUCK UP YOU BRAT." My bedroom door slammed open and my lovely mother's voice greeted me at the start of this terrible day.

I got out of bed to get ready for the first day of senior year in my small town in the middle of no where. Otherwise known as Kansas.

Oh right, I forgot to introduce myself! Hi, I'm Uniqua Caprispantus and I hate my stupid life. My life sucks. I don't have any friends because I'm just a nerd and no guy likes me. Being a nerd sucks because what will being smart and getting into a good college and getting rich in a good job ever get me?

As I walked downstairs my mom poured a bottle of vodka in her morning cereal. She is one of the top lawyers in the country so she doesn't have time for me. my dad died accidentally falling off a cliff even though authorities claimed it was a suicide. Psh whatever. As I was continuing my internal monologue, I realized I was staring off into space, which was interrupted by my mother's daily moaning and groaning.

"Ugh do I actually have to feed you? Do you know how poor we are? What did I do to get such a pathetic daughter." My mom put away the vodka and pulled out the bottle of Jack Daniels. She starting singing to herself as she walked away to her room. "Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down..." she mumbled as she pushed past me to get to her room.

As I went to my room, cuz screw continuity, I pulled on my sweatpants, a random hoodie, and my worn out converse. I had a huge closet full of stuff but I only wore these because only hoes dress up. "I'm so ugly." I sighed as I stared at my bright green-blue-aquamarine eyes that sometimes turned violet in the right light. My perfectly wavy blonde hair fell to my back but I threw it up into a messy bun. I decided to start on my makeup. Since only sluts put on cakes and cupcakes and pastries of makeup, I only applied some mascara and lip gloss.

I ran outside where my gay best friend, Steve, was waiting in his convertible. His gayness was obvious the way he put on his sunglasses and rested his hand on the steering wheel. Man, I am so cool and liberal for having a gay best friend even though they're always guys. I thought to myself as I fist pumped into the air and jump in to his car.

"Hey guuurl," Steve drawled out on the ride to school, "Did you hear about the newest kid in school? He's like, a total hottie, biatch." Steve always had the latest gossip from hanging out near the girl's bathroom for so long, where he would grab each cheerleader that came out and threw glitter at them until they told him what was up.

"Bro, I don't know anything, I've been too busy studying for the SATs." I answered and stared longingly out the window in hope of a life where I wasn't just a nerd but someone cool. Not like those cheerleader hoes though. Steve just swerved through traffic as some random kid stuck his middle finger at us but Steve just blew him a kiss and drove past. Wow, I love my gay best friend.

We arrived to school and started off to class. In the hallway, a girl with a cheerleaders outfit on stuck out her foot and tripped me. I tried not to cry as I ran down the hall with tears about to burst out and Steve chasing me. Why does everyone always pick on me? Steve calmed me down and got us our schedules. It was so cool how we had almost all the same classes together even though there were 2000 kids in our school!

We sat down in World History together and the teacher started teaching us about some kid named Genghis Khan. It was weird that we were learning so much even though it was the first day of school. Oh well, I was a nerd and I loved this stuff, like all the other nerd do. Suddenly the door crashed open and a guy walked in a leather jacket and tattoos all over his arm. Steve let out an appreciative whistle.

"Damn son, I would tap that." I heard him whisper next to me.

"Sorry I'm late, teach." The boy smirked at the teacher.

"Um, yeah whatever go sit in the only seat that's next to Unkind." The teacher replied as he pointed at me. "Anyway, as I was saying, Genghis Khan went off to Greece to fight with the Doctor when..."

"My name is Uniqua!" I exclaimed. The boy smirked as he walked over to me. He then winked. Steve reached over and patted me on the head.

"It's okay," he said, still stroking my soft hair, "no one ever really knows your name most of the time anyway, Unipara."

Leather Jacket Guy finally reached me, still smirking. He slowly sat down, and when he saw me looking at him, he winked.

"Hi, I'm Uniqus." He said in a deep British accent and held my hand up as he kissed it like the true British gentleman he was. Next to me I heard a small gasp, either from Steve or some random bitch who was probably staring at me with jealousy. Ugh why is my life so hard!

*And so um there's that.*

Temporary cover until idk when help me guys.