Sometimes,
I yearn for the feeling to not feel anything at all.
I lay awake broken from the day.
Unable to take back the words I used.
The drama I started.
Because I felt mistreated.
I wish that I did not feel this.
I love you,
But you do not see the worth of it.
I can feel death on my shoulders weighing on my body;
The tightening in my throat;
The sinking in my stomach,
And the urge to vomit.
My first love was not a great story.
It was of pain.
One were I'm told to behave, listen, and have no opinion.
I am told that I am loved.
Is it true when you hit me when you get too angry?
I never wanted to hurt you.
I shouldn't have confronted you.
It'd be fine.
Fighting on my own is normal.
I feel depressed.
It's like feeling everything and nothing at the same time.
Like I am drowning.
I'm suffocating from you.
YOU ARE READING
Tacenda
PoetryThe voices in my head, the scars on my heart, and all the words I would say, if you could simply understand.
