Hello! This is my second Hamilton story. I really hope that you enjoy it!
Trigger warning: suicidal thoughts, attempted suicide.
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-- ??? POV --
I don't fit in here. I never have, I never will. I can't keep pretending, I can never do anything about my feelings, if I do, I will do something that I will regret forever. I could end up telling someone. My family would be ashamed of me, I would be disowned and all alone in the world. I already feel alone and I have everything a girl could wish for. A loving family, a marriage set up, a roof over her head, I should be happy! But I can't enjoy it. Not really. I'm alone. No one will ever understand.
In two weeks I am to be married to Joseph Barnes. I won't be able to hide who I am from him. He'll find out, he'll tell someone! I'll be imprisoned, shamed! I need to do something. I can only think of one solution. It is the best solution for everyone. I need to be gone. Gone from this world. Free from the worries of life. Free from the injustice of the world. Free to be me! Finally, I can be happy.
As I neared the cliff I felt the fresh sea wind dry my tears and whip my hair against my face. It was so peaceful up there. I could hear the calming waves, I could see the pearl white foam hitting the bottom of the cliff. It almost made me re-think my decision. Then I heard a clatter of hooves and moved closer to the edge, ready to step straight off.
"Stop! Charlotte, Lottie, please don't! Step away and come home with me. We can get you help, we can be happy. Please!"
It was Joseph. Oh, sweet, kind Joseph. He was holding his hands out towards me. He looked absolutely terrified. There was another expression on his face too. Love? It couldn't be. I was about to move towards him, perhaps I could learn to love him and get over my difference eventually, when a thought suddenly hit me.
If he found out about my ... my differences would he stop looking at me like that? Would the look of love twist into a look of disgust? He wouldn't accept me. No sane person would. It was better that he remembered me this way.
Salty tears had begun to stream down my face again as I said "I'm Sorry Joseph." And took the final step.
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Ok, hi! I hope you enjoyed that. And if you worked out what she was talking about. Know that I don't feel the same way as her at all. And if you don't know, you'll just have to continue reading!!! Thank you for reading!
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Life savers - Hamilsquad modern day AU
FanficAn 18 year old girl from 1776 is struggling come to terms with her life and tries to end it once and for all. She goes to a cliff edge and jumps. What to her seems like hours later, she wakes up in a different time period?! Sorry, I'm absolutely sh...
