All my love- Why Don't We- Jonah Marais

Saying Goodbye Hurts

I sit in my room, Christina and I both on our phones. "What happened?" She asks looking at me. "With your dad" she says specifying. "Car accident" I say. "Some dude was speeding, my dad drove across the road and was hit by the speeding man who crossed the red light" I say. "Damn" She whispers. "It fucking sucks" I mumble. She puts an arm around me. "Not to sound rude but you can't stay in here all the time, you need fresh air and food also water" she says. I look at the rain. "The weather says otherwise" I say. "Come on, come downstairs for a bit" she says. I give in and walk down.

I sit at the bench playing with my food. "I swear if you don't eat that I will kill you" Christina says. I laugh a little and take a bite. "Good, now more" she says. I eat about half the plate. I walk outside in the rain. Christina went to have a shower. I sit down at the very bottom of the garden hiding myself. I cry. My phone buzzes in my pocket. Jonah💗💗 I shove it back in my pocket. "You can't be out here" I hear a voice say. "You are" I reply to Jake. "Please" He says. "But I like it here" I say. "Come on please" Jake says. I stand up. "Why?" I ask. "Because you'll get sick" Jake says. "It's not like I'm gonna die" I say. "You can't say that" Jake murmurs. "I just did, and it's not like it isn't true" I say.

It's been a couple of weeks and nothing, he hasn't changed, Well only gotten worse. "Isabella we need to talk" Jake says. I see Logan come up behind Jake. I hug him. "What?" I ask worry spread across my face. "Is about Bradley" Logan says. "What?" I ask firmly. "There has been no change in his condition" Jake starts. I nod already knowing this. "So they are turning his machines off today" Logan continues for Jake. "No" I yell. "They can't!" I continue to scream as tears flood. "I want to see him" I say. "Ok" Jake says. We climb into the car and drive.

I run straight past reception and straight to his room. I burst in the door. "Honey you can't be in here" my mom says. "How can you say that!" I exclaim. "That's my dad, I'm not leaving" I say angrily. "Stand back please" some man asks us. I stand beside Logan. They do a couple of things, "ok" another man says. The first one nods. I follow the direction of his hand. Click. A long beep goes after that click. I watch, his heartbeat not showing. The machine goes black. The men walk out of the room. He's gone. I bury my head into Logan's chest and cry. Tears flow without end.

We make it home to Jakes. I still don't say anything, "I made donuts!" Chad yells when we walk in the house. Jake looks at chad with his 'shut up' stare. I just start crying again and run up to my room. Do you ever have that feeling, just not knowing what to do or why you do anything anymore. That was the feeling I've felt over the past few weeks now I know why. To feel nothing at all. You can't feel anything if your dead inside.