Jealousy Drive

Love Free?

Ar'mone hurt me all the time. I got mixed signals from him and I just wanted to be friends with him but he always got me falling for him or following him like a sheep. I really wanted to not like him but I couldn't help myself. I was in love and whatever drew me to him two and a half years ago, still existed. In fact, it was more intense.

There was a new girl at school this year. Her name was Aubrey. She was two years older than I was. She was a sophomore. She wasn't fantastic looking. She just had a nice body I guess. I never paid much attention to her until the day she caught Ar'mone's attention.

I was utterly disturbed by it. Not even because I wanted Ar'mone but because she was older. I just thought it wasn't right. She was too mature for him and he was not responsible enough to deal with a high schooler at such a young age. I really didn't like Aubrey. She was getting too much attention and yes I was jealous.

My hatred for her grew even stronger when she came up to me at lunch and said I should stay away from Ar'mone. She didn't like me around him and she had heard so many stories about him and I. When I told Ar'mone about what had happened he just laughed. I guess that's what threw me off.

My jealousy didn't last for long. I moved on from Ar'mone faster than I thought. I got to know Aubrey through basketball. What were the odds that she would my coach. Cliché huh? I didn't see anything unique about her personality. To be honest, I thought she was fake.

I didn't speak to Ar'mone again. I didn't care about his life anymore and for once I knew that this was the end I was done trying so hard to get his attention. If he didn't like me then it was his loss after all. I couldn't care less about his fling with Aubrey and if he was happy with her, then who would I be to ruin his happiness?

*************

  Christmas break came in a blink of an eye. I wasn't seeing my classmates everyday anymore. It felt great. Nobody could bully me online because they weren't seeing my emotions. Whatsapp was the only place where I felt happy. I could say things that I couldn't say to people face to face. I felt stronger.

I could easily annoy people without being insulted about it. I loved trouble but I didn't like the aftermath. One day, I decided to disturb Quincy by sending a text that said...

Taj'nique- Hey Boo

I was kinda scared to see what he would say. I wanted to delete it but there was no going back after I hit the send button. I wanted the ground to swallow me, then regurgitate me, then swallow me again. What was I thinking when I sent it?

A couple minuted later my phone buzzed. I knew it was a Whatsapp notification. I had butterflies in my stomach. I didn't want to go online again. I didn't even want to know who had sent me a message. I just needed time to see how I would take in all the insults that I was about to receive.

Later in the day, I came to a conclusion that I would just say it was a mistake and it was not meant for him. I picked up my phone to send the message and indeed it was him who had sent the message at the time. I stared at my phone for some seconds before I unlocked it.

I clicked on my Whatsapp and then on the contact that send Quincy on the screen. His message wasn't long. It wasn't what I expected. I was so confused.

Quincy- Hey!
Quincy- 😍

It felt like a dream. Like a big mistake. I couldn't believe what I saw. A freaking heart eyed emoji! FROM QUINCY!!! I was confused but happy at the same time. Nothing else mattered to me. I didn't even care why he was so nice. I decided to send another text.

Taj'nique- Missing me?

***A minute later***

Quincy- I am. How are you?

The conversation that night felt magical. I was finally accepted by the most important person in DNA. I was so happy that things would change for me when I got back to school. I could just imagine hanging out with DNA a lot more, eating lunch with them, and the girls and boys finally becoming closer.

Days passed by. Christmas break was coming to an end. Quincy and I began to talk everyday. He just said everything I needed to hear at the right time. Things were moving quickly between us. One day, he sent a very unusual text.

Quincy- Taj, I want us to be best friends. I want us to share anything with each other and trust each other.

No one had ever said this to me before in that way. I felt wanted and accepted. This was what I had always wanted and it felt great. I looked forward to every conversation we had online.

Taj'nique- That'll be nice.

From then on, we stayed up talking to each other all night because none of us wanted to end the conversation. Even when we did decide to go to bed, we fought over who would say the last 'bye'. I was slowly getting so close to this guy. I saw a different side to Quincy. He was kind, sweet, caring, and he was a softie. He was way different from the person I knew at school. I loved the new person I had uncovered. I really did. I wanted to be more than his best friend but I didn't want to say it because I was scared that he wouldn't feel the same way. I didn't want to get hurt by him. I was finally at a good place with him. I didn't want to scare him off.

Christmas break was slowly receding. We had three more days till school resumed. Quincy didn't change. He was still the same sweet person. There was always something to talk about. We played different games and I got to know him better and vice versa. We actually had similar interests but at the same time we were completely different.

He was one of the last people I'd ever seen myself going for but things changed. My close friend Keisha had a massive crush on Quincy and I was aware of it from the start but after that first message I sent, things changed I didn't care about my best friend's feelings towards this guy. Yes I was selfish and wrong for making moves with a guy that my friend wanted but Quincy and I had connected so much. I felt so happy to finally get the acknowledgment and I really didn't care about her feelings. Besides, he didn't like her back but he didn't know how to say it.

The day before we were back at school I told Quincy how I felt. It took a lot in me to do what I did but I just had to do it. I hated to keep my feelings to myself. I had to tell him.

Taj'nique- I have to tell you something important. It's been on my mind lately.

Quincy- 😖 I'm scared. What is it?

Taj'nique- I.....

Quincy- ....?

Taj'nique- I like you

I didn't get a reply for a while and started to feel agitated. What had I done? I just ruined a perfect friendship because of my stupid feelings. I fell too fast and now I had chased him away. Stupid stupid stupid!!!! I put my head in my pillow and screamed out loud. Oh my gosh Taj...Why couldn't you just stay love free?

How was this chapter? Just finished it exactly at 2am. I can't sleep and I have been working on this for a couple hours. I'll put up what the characters would probably look like soon so you have an idea of what the real people look like. Then again, you can use your imagination. Thanks for reading. I love you all