The Bat and the Spider (A Batman and Spiderman Crossover)

Invitations

Spiderman decided it was high time he made an appearance. Wade was staying home, just in case. As he was swinging around, he spotted the batsignal. 

Once he arrived on top of the police station's roof, he startled a man with graying red hair, a mustache, and a trench-coat. "Who are you?" The man looked him up and down, a glare forming. 

"He's a friend," The oh-so familiar voice of Batman spoke from above. He leapt down next to him, Robin right behind. 

"Spiderman, at your service." Peter bowed extravagantly. Now it was Batman's turn to glare. 

"Aw..." Deadpool popped out from behind him. Peter yelped, webbing Deadpool to the wall. 

"Oh, it's you." Peter frowned, crossing his arms. "I thought we agreed it'd be for the best if you didn't show your face." 

"I'm not showing my face, that's the point of the mask!" Wade pointed out. 

"You know what I meant! I swear if you kill anyone, you'll be plucking bullets out of your skull." Peter threatened, crossing his arms. 

"Oh come on! Not even a little bit?" Wade complained. 

"Who's this?" Batman gave Peter an even harder glare, his eyes narrowed into practical slits. 

"This is Deadpool," Peter growled. 

"Well, he isn't being very polite." Deadpool turned to face the readers. "Do you think I should jump off the building? I'm thinking yes, but I'm not sure." 

"Who are you speaking with?" Robin crossed his arms, his face imitating Batman's. 

"I'm doing it, I am so doing it. I wanna see their faces!" Wade smirked as he looked down. He extended his arms, and fell backwards. Batman didn't seem too worried, as he'd seen Spiderman pull the same stunt a few times. But then after there was a sickening crack, Batman, Robin, and the mustache-man ran over to the edge. Spiderman more casually walked over. 

"He's...he's actually dead!" Mustache-man exclaimed. 

"Really!" Peter widened his eyes, a wide smile underneath his mask. He swung down next to Deadpool, Batman and Robin grappling down after him. "Eh, he'll be fine in a few hours." 

"What do you mean he'll be fine in a few hours?" Batman glared harshly at Spiderman. 

"He heals fast." Spiderman shrugged. 

"Not if it's an injury too bad to heal from." Batman's gravely voice seemed to be trying to reach Peter. 

"Actually, I think he's banned from dying." Spiderman sighed. 

"Right you are, Spidey! It's too bad, though, because Lady Death is really hot. Stupid Thanos and your stupid infinity gauntlet." Deadpool grumbled, his body slowly piecing itself back together on the ground. 

"Amen to that last part," Peter shuddered, remembering being stuck in the soul stone. Batman and Robin mostly just stared. "And you're going to go home, and you can slay some imaginary ninja's in your mind." 

"Fine, but only because the author lady is making me," Deadpool peeled himself off the ground, some of his bones hanging out in awkward angles. 

"Does that...hurt?" Robin raised an eyebrow. 

"It used to," Deadpool shrugged. "Now I really don't feel it as much." 

"Come on, let's go figure out what the cop dude wanted." Spiderman webbed his way to the top of the building to where the commissioner was waiting.