Chuck and Sammy

This is Dylan...

[So as some of you may have noticed I have changed some of the names around. Hopefully this won't be too confusing. However the name has changed from Cai Chuck Barnaby to Sam Chuck Barnaby.]

Dylan seems like a decent guy to hang out with if I end up in here. He also seems to have a good sense of humour as well which is always a good thing, nothing worse than having a friend with a terrible sense of humour and just takes everything seriously. "So what brought you here then?" He asks. I figured that if I'm going to end up in here, I may as well just tell him what is actually going on in my life to make me decide to go and drag myself here. "Well...uh...let's just say that there are a few things in life that are disagreeing with me". He continues staring at me with curious painted all over his face, so I'm guessing that that answer wasn't good enough. "There's a whole lot of family drama at the moment, mum and dad are constantly arguing, school is just throwing heaps of pressure onto me because they want me to achieve the best in life and want me to achieve my career in writing because I wrote one amazing speech apparently. Also, i'm a lonely guy with one friend, who I don't even think likes me" There it's all out. Saying it just like that makes me seem really pathetic for being in here, I'm sure there are people who are worse but Dylan seems to understand because he just gives me a half smile and pats me on the shoulder. "Well kid, I'll be your friend, who DOES like you!" I smile appreciatively at him and just ask i ask him what's his excuse, I'm interrupted by a middle aged guy dressed all in white  calling my name. "Mr Barnaby" I hate how they have to call you by your surname, especially when it came to my surname. I could hear Dylan laughing silently next to me and knew exactly what he was laughing at. "Mr Barnaby?" he called again. Dylan was laughing even louder now so I immediately got up just to end the pain of embarrassment. "Mr Barnaby? really?" Dylan chuckled. I couldn't help but laugh with him "That's also another reason why I'm here" I laughed which also made him laugh even more. I guess you can now see what I mean when he has a good sense of humour. I followed the doctor all the way down the corridor for what seemed to go on for miles. I hope i remember my way back or I'll probably just end up spending all my time here getting lost.

We finally came to a room then labelled Room 101, which immediately reminded me of the television show Room 101 where you discuss something you hate and want to put in Room 101 so you never have to see it again.  Maybe it wasn't just a coincidence they named this room the "Therapy Room" because this is the room where you talk about your troubles and help them get dealt with so you never have to talk about them again - problem gone straight into Room 101. 

As we got into the room I was expecting it to be some sort of fancy room to make you feel more welcome, but it was far from that. All it was was just a plain white room with a small desk in the middle and a small wooden chair on the other side of the room. "Take a seat" Doc said, which I immediately did. The room felt really uncomfortable and everything just seemed to echo, even the papers that Doc was handling on the desk. "So it's Sam Chuck Barnaby right? and you're 18"

"Right".

"Okay well then Sam, why do you feel you need to come here?" I've never really thought about it that way, what actually made me feel i needed to come here, i only came here because i know i need to. Infact I couldn't put it into words on what brought me here. I could feel the lump in my throat building up as Doc just stared at me. The silence was deafening, I couldn't tell him, I never told anyone what was truly going through my hectic mind, because A) it was my mind, I didn't want anyone to think they could go digging through it and, B) I'm not the best when it comes to putting words together. "Sam? You know the only way I know you're going to be okay here is if you start supplying me with some answers". He chuckled.

"I...I don't know" I whispered. It wasn't meant to come out as a whisper but I felt so under pressure, and so screwed up. Here I am, admitting myself into a Psychiatric award because I feel like I’m crazy, yet I didn't think of any real reason to give them to actually allow myself in here. Thoughts were just flooding my mind, one by one they kept coming. Why did that guy have to stop for me? Why did I go with him? Why did I bring myself here? Why couldn't I just have a normal happy life? But why - 

My thoughts were cut off by the interruption of Doc who must've read me easily enough to know that something was going on in my mind since he asked me the following question "What's going through your mind right now?" to which i just quickly without even thinking about it responded with the final thought. "Why didn't I jump?". Then there was nothing but concern painted with black across his face. This made him stop laughing, but go deadly serious. "Because you still want to live". I don't know what it was about this answer, but it felt like a grenade had just been triggered inside me because i stood up kicking the chair back right against the metal drawers causing the whole room to clash. "I....I feel like I can't handle being here anymore. I mean, everything is just so insane and too crazy to handle. There's no other way of putting it, I don't want to live and I feel as if I stay here any longer, I'll slowly start crumbling, and it'll be so painful that it's just making me think that surely...surely it's just easier to throw myself into complete destruction where it will be quick and easy rather than watch myself slowly and painfully crumble away. No one wants to handle more pain than they have too, so what's the point? Huh? Answer that Doc, what's the point of me wanting to be alive if I'm just crumbling away anyway?"

                                                                                             ~~~

I'm guessing the last lecture must have done it, because here I am walking back to reception with papers in my hand telling me I can stay here straight away. I know I should call my parents and tell them that I'm okay, and collect some clothes and stuff, but truth is, if I leave now I'll never have the courage to come back again. Back at reception Dylan is still sitting there and raises his cup of what must now be the coffee smiling at me. "Are you okay sir?" The lady asks. I realise I still have my flowers in my hands, but just hand her the papers instead to which she replies. "I'll get someone to bring you to your room now". 

"Waait, it's okay!" Dylan walks up to us. "It's okay, I'll do. I pretty much know this place off by heart now" and winks and the woman. She hesitates and first but then hands him the keys and smiles us both off. 

It takes forever to reach the Psychiatric floor because Dylan has a fear of elevators and the floor is on the 20th floor. "So I never really got your full name?" Dylan sighs heavily. Clearly his athletic figure just comes naturally and not from any effort at all. "It's Sam Chuck Barnaby". This triggers him to laugh full on and I have to admit I understand why. "Really? What were your parents thinking man?" 

"Yeah yeah get over it, but it's Chuck not Sam". We reach the floor finally and stop to catch back out breaths. "So why Chuck?" He asks. There was no amazing answer as to why. "It's just what I preferred and what people called me by so it sort of became my first name"I reply. He looks at me strangely with disgust. "I don't like it" He spits out. "Besides, since you're here now and your new life is starting to begin, you're now officially known as Sammy" Brilliant, so here I am trying to improve my life and i'm given the nickname of Sammy which makes me sound like a 12 year old boy, but I decide to just agree with him and stick with it since at least it might help with the change I want. 

The floor seemed more chilled than I thought. People are walking around freely in whatever clothes they want. I have to admit I was actually excited to see everyone walking around in strait jackets or something like that, but here, everyone just seemed normal. That was until we saw a young girl who seemed like she was aged 16 or something completely crying her eyes out walking towards us. Her eyes were completely bloodshot and she has one heck of a runny nose. "Heeey, don't cry it's okay!" Dylan tried to reassure her, but she just simply looked at him for a split second and screamed even louder. "HE BROKE UP WITH ME" she screamed. I felt bad for her and realised that I was still holding the Lilly's that the guy gave me and felt the need to give them to her so I did. "Here, have these". She hesitated at first and looked at them as if she'd never seen flowers before. She reached out slowly with her hand shaking at 100 miles per hour and smiled at me. "Thank...you" she choked out and walked off with the cutest smile on her face. Dylan simply looked at me stunned and shook his head while continuing on down the corridor. "You sure have got the charm haven't you". I smiled to myself at what I took as a compliment. "She needed them more than I did". Which was a hundred percent true. 

After ten minutes of walking, we reached the room labelled 202. "This is your room" Dylan smiled. "Welcome to hell!

Please let me know what you all think of this, any feedback is welcome - negative or positive as I am trying to improve :) thank yoou!