I knew that my life would change very much after discovering that I'm expecting a child.
It took me a few days to recover. All this time I layed in bed thinking mad about what to do. I was thinking about abortion or adoption.
Adoption seemed to me a good option, because I couldn't develop a career, being a single mother. Of course Tash would help, but I knew it was not enough.
I did not wanted to talk about it with Clinton. I was afraid of his reaction and most of all I felt a great anger at him and I didn't wanted him to be part of my life. I wanted to forget, but I didn't known if it would be possible since I was pregnant with him.
One of my sides told me that he must find out because this was his child, but the second told me that it would be better if I didn't told him anything and gave the child up for adoption.
I was still fighting with myself while I was going from a doctor's office with a briefcase with a professional pregnancy test, which was done on the basis of blood tests that I made a week earlier. I didn't opened them yet, but I wanted to open them in the office. I was supposed to go to the doctor with them, and he was going to explain everything I should know.
I went into the building, heading up the stairs to my room, where I found Ryan arranging prints on the big drawing board.
"Hey," I waved to him, biting my lower lip.
"Hi Angie"he said with a smile "How was vacation?"
"Sucks, I was sick"I lied, throwing the briefcase and the bag on the couch, then headed to the bathroom.
After a few minutes, I returned to the room, finding Ryan... with an open file?
"What...?" I looked at him in shock.
"I'm sorry, I thought you had prints from Waterparks' photoshoot" he scratched his neck, handing me closed file "Angeline, are you pregnant?"
"I doubt I'm taking tests for another Angeline," I bit back, falling on the couch. I felt like shit and I knew that he would assess me.
"There was written that it was the sixth week... Did you got pregnant in Australia?" his eyes were as huge as saucers.
"Yeah..." I said with a sneer, looking at him with deadly eyes.
"Do you know the father?" he sat on the edge of the couch, squeezing my hand in his. His look to my surprise was full of compassion. He didn't wanted to judge me.
"Yes." My voice shook considerably, and my eyes filled with tears.
"Did you talked to him?" he asked after a moment.
"It doesn't make sense... Ryan, I'll give the child up for adoption, it doesn't make any sense. I want to live a normal life" I felt him embrace me tightly, and I began to weep in his shoulder.
"Think about it, Angie," the blue-haired man whispered. "Don't do anything that you'll regret in the future."
I nodded my head in his arm and said quietly:
"Thanks for being here, Ryan."
***
After working on the prints and setting up a convenient schedule for me for the next week, I was returning in my Toyota Prius to Santa Monica. I didn't known if today Tash will be able to come through the busy week in her work, but I knew that today I'll manage somehow without her.
I listened to the radio, swaying to the rhythm of The Maine's song. I sang the lyrics, feeling myself, for the first time in a long time.
After a wonderful three minutes, I heard the voice of the announcer announcing the acoustic performance of a thriving band.
