anytime, anyplace.

toast to clichés in a dark past.

Anger is a pointless emotion when that aggression can be used to intensify moments that actually do matter.

last night over the phone jahsynt conviced me to come over his house today after school, which makes me a little nervous. i don't want genesis all up in my business about where i am and all that shit. azmarie hasn't really been talking to me for real which kind irks me because if it's really about me not telling her about jahsynt, then this shit is really petty. but i'm sure if that's really the case. whatever. if she not fucking with me, i'm not fucking with her.

in our history class, we did nothing but watch movies. today it was forest gump. i love that movie, but it always makes me cry because that whore jenny constantly did forest wrong. in the end, she didn't contact him because she loved him and missed him, but only so he could take care of their son after she died. she pisses me off. we were still at the beginning when jahsynt pulled me over to his desk by the leg of my chair. luckily we were sitting in the back of the classroom, so nobody was paying attention to us. i was in a mood. a good mood. a strangely good mood. i buried my face in the crook of jahsynt's neck because he smelled so good.

in summary, the morning was nice. very nice.

*

jahsynt decides to pick me up after school instead of making me walk the whole fifteen to twenty minute stride to his place. pulled up wearing a red v-neck with some jeans. he probably wore the same thing to school but i wouldn't know, he kept his sweatshirt on the whole day.

"hey." i say as i sit in the passenger seat. i'm not wearing anything spectacular. just my black t-shirt and some cut off shorts with a white gold chain to make it all look nice. to make it look like i tried.. my hair tied up in some i-don't-give-a-fuck knot. my face is nice though, eyeliner, mascara and lip-gloss can do so much to a naked face.

"yo." he reaches over, pulls my hand to his lips and kisses it. awwn. then he just interlocks our fingers and pulls off.

"how was your day?"

"it was aight. you?"

i shrug. "boring." looking over at his face and pulling on my seatbelt. his skin is sooo flawless. brown skinned boys are life. while i admire his born structure, i start think that he almost looks like one of those gorgeous new-age nigerians but his face isn't that extreme.

he doesn't even look at me when he says, "fuck you staring at, bae?"

i laugh. "ugh, you always catch me slipping."

"you better know it."

"fuck you."

"that's your job."

"you irk me." i continue to stare while my mind vacillates, settling on that shit me and genesis were discussing last night. that shit about instagram and tyrian. how could she like tyrian? that shit was just weird to me. tyrian was a nice guy but he wasn't boyfriend material. we had a decent relationship but it wasn't really fulfilling. it was like i was dating him just to have a boyfriend. but he was a cool friend and we stayed cool after i broke up with him. and then that instagram thing. was she tryna throw shade by pointing out that i wasn't on jahsynt's page? ugh. this shit was stressing me out. before i even realize it, the car has stopped.

"bae, you aight?"

"hmm?" i blink and turn to him.

"you ok? you look a lil out of it."

"im...fine."

"well c'mon then."

his house is so much prettier than mine. probably because his mother makes way more money than mine. he kicks his shoes off and drapes himself across the beige sofa. i lay next to him because there's enough space for two.  i turn to face him and he wraps his arms around me.  closing his eyes he says, "your sister followed me on instagram."