"and how is my amazing best friend doing today?"
luke looked up when he heard michael walk through the door of his apartment.
"uh. not so good today." luke said, and smiled a little despite what he's feeling.
michael's face fell as he walked over to luke.
"oh. come here." michael whispered, and luke fell into his arms, just letting michael hold him.
"what's wrong?" michael whispered.
"nothing. just don't feel good..." luke mumbled, and michael kissed luke's head before pulling back. "...hey, do you think maybe today we could have one of our movie nights. like where we build a fort and eat a lot more than we should. minus the sex part, of course." luke said, and michael frowned a little, making luke's face fall.
"mikey, please?" luke whispered.
"okay. yeah. i'll be here." michael said quietly, and luke smiled, hugging michael again.
"thank you thank you thank y-"
"luke.." michael laughed, holding the younger boy in his arms.
luke smiled and looked up.
"are you all packed for the tour?" luke asked softly, and michael nodded.
"actually, can i talk to you about something?..." michael said quietly, and luke nodded. "...truth is, i'm not doing so great today either."
"we should be happy. the tour is tomorrow but instead-"
"me and carly broke up. well, we knew from the start it was just gonna be a fling because of the tour and everything, but it still kinda sucks. i really like her, luke."
luke knew his cynical attitude wouldn't help at all, but he was so relieved to hear those words.
"oh, mikey. it's okay-"
"it's not." michael whispered and luke looked up.
he could see just how upset michael was and it caused every bit of his happiness to go away too.
he just wanted michael to be happy.
"i'm sorry. i wish there was something could do to help." luke whispered.
"there's not." michael whispered, and luke raised an eyebrow.
"i mean, there is one thing i could do..." luke whispered, pressing his lips to michael's neck. "...or maybe a few things i could do to you."
"you're kidding me, right?" michael asked, and luke looked at michael, not knowing what to think of that response.
"i- um. i just thought-"
"you just thought what? now that i'm vulnerable you can finally get what you want because you can't find anyone else?" michael said, and luke shook his head.
"no, i just-"
"just stop."
luke stood there feeling so small even though he was taller than michael. he wanted a vortex to open up and consume him just so he wouldn't have to deal with how uncomfortable the situation was.
he didn't say anything else, but just stood there with big, embarrassed tears in his eyes. he kept his gaze off of michael, and just listened.
"you're so desperate, luke. it's always just about sex for you!"
luke looked up, and glared at the older boy in front of him. something about that last comment made something inside of him burn.
but he just couldn't speak for some reason.
his heart was breaking all over again.
"i found carly and at first i thought it was just for fun. then- she wanted something more from me than just sex. she wanted to make me happy. she wanted to listen to me, and she- god, she's perfect. she isn't selfish like everyone else i've ever been with. including you. you're so selfish, luke."
he just couldn't bring himself to tell michael all he wanted was to be able to call michael his.
because that was selfish too.
he kept his tears in.
if he cried right now, that would be pretty selfish.
michael left just seconds after that, and luke allowed himself to completely break, falling to the floor and crying more than he ever had.
selfish.
