A simple girl with a hard life

Endless night

So yeh I went to a party well my like a BBQ but it all got ruined by the Endless night..

Well you see the house we went to was near Callum's and I miss him dearly actually too fucking much but if you've been listening you'd know as about para I sent to him. Anyway I got a really bad feeling my stomach probably due to the fact as my mother was looking for a parking space we down a road which had alley down where you can see Callum's house and I see a brown haired girl walk up and I couldn't help but think she was coming from his house cause obviously he is someone who is just amazing like seriously, and the biggest thing ever she wasn't me and didn't have a package and wasn't broken goods and all that shit. When we got to the BBQ about ten minutes later I was in a foul mood and was pretty pissed off. Here was alcohol here and I was allowed to drink but I knew if I did it wouldn't end well as I wasn't in the or a mood and with my drinking problems I didn't feel like it even if it was vey tempting later on, anyway my mum caught and I just said I was I'll. But truth was, I was heartbroken!

When I got home, I cried for about three hours the decided I needed a drink I had geared all the liquid out of me walking into the kitchen bending down looking in the cupboard and see alcohol knowing what it would do to me and my history with it I whipped my tear away I got out some fanta and took some tablets for to reasoned. 1. Hoping it would stop whatever pain. I know stupid and 2. So my mum would think I was I'll. I got into bed and curled there and hugged my teddy I know to old for a teddy well it was on my wardrobe and has been ever since I was like five. I had to cry my sobs into something that's wouldn't hurt my face. After a while I realised there was mascara on lucky my one hundred and one Dalmatian teddy. I sort of have an obsession.

Due to my spots I've been getting all over my face, I realised I was stressing out way too much about boys, Callum, friends, girls, work, finding a new job, organising a party and so much I decide to have a break so I am visiting my dad who lives in Deptford. I don't know how long it can't be too long as I had court in a week. Now you properly think now what the hell has she done. Nothing I had a car crash where a bus drove into the side of my car as it was a low backed sports car I got the impact and got whip lash so I'm going to court. I was also stressing as I need to decide wether to take something or should I say someone else to court as I witness them do some terrible things which I shall not get into detail. As well it disgusts me, how people can be such twisted sick perverts or sick minded. So it's my first day here and it was pretty chilled until my father mentioned something I didn't not want to talk about the court case. The second one with sick minded arsehole. But I class my self to be a belle kind of girl, you know reads books and gets into them, would do anything for her family. And is very caring. Well of a night time for last five months I've been reading books and they are so passionate they make my heart race at times. I can feel so many emotions I couldn't even feel in real life. So far my two favourite books would have to be 'more than friends.' And the second was called ' bad girl.' Fuck me they are amazing bad girl makes my heart race with adorable-ness so much that it makes me feel like I'm in the book for once and that my life was jackie's. Oh how I wish. Jackie was so brave and even though the arse of a boy that she loved was a complete dick she was still strong.

I wish I was a bad girl.

What was really crazy was I actually had a really good day Friday. I bet you're thinking why? Well, it was all thanks to some guy called Louis B, you see we used to have this fling but it was more of messing around nothing would have ever happened between us. Anyway he was at work and I had to collect some money from people he ran out and asked me if I could buy him lunch as he was so busy so me being me said of course. Anyway I brought it and went back I said I'd come see him after I'd collected the money of off two people I know and get along with. After I spent about ten minutes with them I went to see Louis and he asked if I wanted to say and help him so I ended up staying with him until like six o'clock as I helped him work I made milkshakes, we danced, and sand, cleaned up and even messed around more it was great I really did miss having people to have fun with.