Eternal Light

Chapter 2: Near Death

As they took the body from Hao, he remained rooted to the spot. He lost the will to move or speak after what had happened. He hated the pity that he was receiving especially since some of the people were either pretending to be sad about her death or were jealous of Yumi, some were even mentally happy that he had 'got what was coming to him' to his shock for he did not know why there were being like this with him.

Right now Hao felt as if he had nothing more to live for now. What was the point if everyone was going to leave him alone? Whether it was intentional or not.

Enough was enough now.

That same night, Hao stood by a lake that was near the shrine containing cherry blossoms. The air was tense and full of unease, almost as if it was holding it's breath to see what he was going to do. Hao ignored it all as he looked at the sky with a pained expression. His eyes then trailed to the dagger he had smuggled from the house, it was hiding under the right sleeve and no one knew of what he was going to do, or that he had such an item in his possession. The item now glinted the moment the moonlight's beam hit the shiny metal part of the item making it reflect harmlessly. Hao stared at it for some time, almost as if he were in a trance. Transfixed by the metal as his reflection appeared on the cold steel. Hao's eyes narrowed with hate, seeing his reflection look back at him as it taunted him, the dagger was too clean even though the one that took his wife was tainted with crimson blood, he remembered it sticking out of her stomach where their baby was and how he forced it out with shaky hands. Not caring if it stained him, just as long as he could get it out of her.

He remembered hearing her soft whimpers as death slowly consumed her, his hand held her while the other hand that contained the dagger; he had dropped the dagger causing it to make a few noises while staining the ground with blood- her blood. Hao's fingers then trembled with fear and sorrow as he stroked her cheek smearing it with her own blood, he was unscathed but she wasn't nor will she open her eyes as pain took over her mind. Hao had cried her name as tears ran furiously down his cheeks and pulled her closer to him. Even though she was dying she forced her hand to his cheek and smiled with her eyes open. It hurt him deeply to see her smile in such a manner despite the fact that when she was on death's doors, she opened her mouth as if she was about to say something before her eyes darkened, her hand fell lifelessly to the floor beside her white yukata and never moved again after that.

Hao began to loath the clean purity of this item the more he stared at it. Raising it to his face he observed it for a while before his left hand moved up revealing creamy white skin that was unmarked, Hao's eyes trailed to see the left arm before his eyes narrowed with fury. He had never done this before though, it was new and very dangerous. But for now he didn't care anymore, he wanted to test fate and spit at the cruel life which had been given to him.

He never asked for this, so why even put him through it all?

Why did his mother smile and sheltered him with love if she was going to be killed? Why did she let him live by sending him away? He could have gone with her even in death.

Why did the Gods give him a wife with a child if they were going to be taken away from him? He could hear the sounds of laughter mocking him through the air; he knew that it was coming from those who did this to him. They were getting away with it so why should he allow this to continue?

Why remain kind when he could fight back as well and make everyone feel the same way as he?

Without thinking he sent the dagger though the inner part of his skin near his upper wrist. Hao grunted slightly as a small red line appeared before crimson started to form from where he had cut himself, Hao began to feel excruciating pain the moment his body started to register what had just happened, this caused him to grit his teeth. Immediately he started to shake as his body reacted to being hurt.

What had he done?

He had just done something that was out of character, even for him. Part of him was horrified but the other part of him loved this. He felt happy, free to see as well as feel this newfound sensation.

Hao relished this pain though. In a way it felt good to feel this cold numbing effect, however it wasn't enough seeing that thin line ooze blood down his arm. He wanted more and began to feel greedy to the point that he did it again to where the blood nearly touched the new line.

A cold smile appeared on Hao's face as he watched his work unfold before his very eyes, at the same time Hao's eyes were turning lifeless and dull. His eyes then turned to his right arm and sneered. Why should his right arm feel left out when his left has been blemished? Oh no we can't have that can we?

Hao began to place the dagger with his left hand, it was shaking from the pain but Hao didn't care. He wanted to do this. This pain was his to enjoy now and no one, no one was going to stop him. If this meant he'd die then so be it.

Hao smirked at the thought of Yumi seeing him in the afterlife. Would she wait for him? It wouldn't be long now as he cut his right arm a little deeper. A dry raspy chuckle escaped his lips as the dagger was now soiled with blood to the point that it touched his fingers with sticky hot liquid.

"Soon, soon it'll be all over now" Hao's voice shook as he resisted the urge to cry out in pain. His eyes were filled with hazy images now as the loss of blood was now finally taking effect. His body could no longer fight it off; his strength grew weaker with each minute that had gone past.

Hao sank to his knees now smiling more widely and panted heavily as he looked at the tree now seeing the petals dance from the wind. For a moment he could almost see his wife now, he wasn't sure if she was smiling as she greeted him but all that mattered was seeing her.

"Yumi..." her name left his lips before he fell down on the cold soil.