The Sibling Struggle

Chp 1- The Mioda Life

Roxanne's POV

I woke up to the feeling of bandages being put on my arms. I open my eyes and look to my right and see the clock, reading 2:30pm, 'I WAS OUT THAT LONG!?' is my first thought when I see it. Then I look to my left and see my brother, Foxy, putting new bandages on my let arm, my right already being recovered. He looks up and sees I'm awake, "Good afternoon sis, heh, sleep well?" he asks, finishing with my arms and throwing away the old, dirty ones.

"Was I really out for three hours?"

"Yeah, she got you good this time.... Why won't you let us help you?" With that question, I avoid eye contact with him, not wanting to answer him again with this question.

"Foxy... You know why I say no, I take your beatings, if you help, that will get you beat and I don't want you guys to go through that. I want anything but that to happen."

"I know, but we don't want you to go through this stuff! You don't deserve this! None of us do...." I can see the sadness in his eyes as he says this, feeling regret for not being able to help any of us, us being all the poor orphans stuck in this hell hole. I feel bad for all the others, they don't deserve this but, I do. All I ever do is fuck everything up, I can't do anything right. While my siblings, they didn't do anything to deserve any of this pain, but........ They're stuck with me, I can't change that. I wish I could though... Anyways, as Foxy is walking out the door, I ask him one final question, "What time are they coming? The interviewers?" I ask as I slowly stand to my feet, walking to m closet. 

"They're coming around four I think, so you better rest while you can."

"To late! I'm already standing!" I say as I pick my usual outfit from my closet.

"Ugh... Your such a handful, heh." He says as he walks to the door.

"You love me somehow though!" 

"Somehow, haha!" He says as he playfully rolls his eyes, giving me a playful glare before walking out the door and down the hall, towards his room. I put my cloths on my arm before walking out of the door myself, shutting it behind me. I walk down the hall towards the bathroom, ignoring all the insults I get on the way. I go in and lock the door, sitting the cloths on the edge of the sink and sliding down the door, eventually hitting the floor. After thinking it over, I stand up and start the water, turning it to warm. Then, I go into the cabinets and look for my secret spot, a place in there no one checks, behind the drawer. I put my hand behind it, looking for my favorite item. Then, I feel my fingers glance over it, grabbing it and pulling out, seeing my razor. I look in the dusty mirror above the sink, looking at what a mess I am. I get a firm hold on the razor and glide it over my wrists, that were already covered with scars from past times. The pain from the razor was the most feeling I've had all day. It feels like so much pleasure, running through my body, taking away the pain I bottle up...

CUT: for being ugly...

CUT: for being worthless...

CUT: for being fat...

CUT: for being a waste of time...

Cut after cut, there's a different reason for each one, I keep going til' I reach sixty cuts, stopping there for now. I strip of my cloths and step into the shower, washing the remaining blood off my wrists and thighs, fifteen clean, straight cuts on each limb. I smile when I see them, knowing I deserved this. As I reach for the shampoo, my arm hurts from the lost of blood. This is gonna be a long day.........

TO BE CONTINUED....

Hey guys!!! So, I finally got a chapter out, I've been really busy with school lately so I haven't had time to update.... BUT! I had time this weekend to do it, so now I'm here! I hope you guys are enjoying the book so far, even though there's only two chapters lol. So yeah, here's the new update! Sorry if it's to depressing for you....... Author~Chan out!