Temporary Bliss | Jimin ✔

Alternate Ending

Today, there are five things that you learned. The first is that you shouldn't have let yourself into something you know would end up having your heart marred in the first place. You shouldn't have played it in the first place when in the end, you'd lose.

The thing about playing a game that you know you're going to lose is that you don't play it in the first place. It's always been a perilous thing to play but you gambled anyway and had gotten your feelings stirred, exposed them to change, resulting in you falling in love with the man who was only helping you to achieve your goal.

The image of you leaving Jimin that day at the rest house never failed to cross your mind, the afterimage of him biting his lower lip to keep himself from crying and him turning around once you get in Jungkook's car had consumed your dreams at night. It made you question whether you did the right thing, musing what would have happened if you just stayed like Jimin wanted you to.

But in staying, you would feel like your heart would break more, you wouldn't be able to feel at peace, wouldn't be able to achieve the solitude you needed in the first place. And if you hadn't left, you wouldn't realize that in those five days, the love you felt for him prevailed everything else.

You wouldn't realize how much it was a nuisance to have a heart that's ripped into pieces, how weird it was to feel torn apart when the thing between you and Jimin wasn't even alive in the first place; it wasn't even a fire that could be lit up. An artificial fire is simply what it was and what you thrived is to build a strong inferno with him as a result of the passion between you two and in turn, you'd both watch that flame ignite.

In this, your mind registers clearly that you love him more than you hate what he did and it's this love that made you finally get out of the house because if you had stayed longer, it would have felt like the walls of your flat had closed in on you, suffocating you, making it hard for your lungs to seek the air, leaving you without sunlight seeping through and you think that in seeing Jimin again, you'd see your ray of sun once more.

If you decided to not go at all and let this one shot with him slip away, you would live with regret for the rest of your life. As you ran, the only thoughts that raced through your mind was that you should've done this sooner but it was better late than never and if Jimin opens that door and pulls you into his embrace as soon as you say that it's him you're choosing and that you want to start over and make it real with him, that'll be the moment when you know that it was the best decision you have ever made.

Seeing Jungkook and Namjoon in Jimin's flat when you arrived wasn't what you expected to see. Having to witness their inscrutable faces and hearing five words were all it took for you to know that you were too late. You sprinted to his apartment, out of air when you were outside his door but when they told you those exact words, it felt like you really were unable to breathe as if someone had decided to rob every air that you breathed and that your legs were shaped into jelly because you just wanted to collapse right then and there.

"Uh, hi—where's Jimin?" You asked when Jungkook had opened the door to Jimin's place, eyes barely blinking as your chest heaved and your hand trembled with anticipation for him to suddenly appear behind but instead, it was Namjoon who entered your field of vision.

"Y/N," Jungkook said softly, almost inaudible before darting his gaze on the floor. With confusion taking over your mind and your heart pounding blaringly in your rib cage, you pushed past to enter and surveyed the whole area, going to every room and finding no sign of him.

With a face that's on the precipice of spilling tears, you asked one more time, quivering with apprehension for the answer, "Where is he?"

His things were there—from the shirts lying around perched on the stools, his half shut laptop with pens, rulers and graphing papers beside it on the coffee table to the photo frames that were on his wall containing photographs of him when he was a kid, of him with his family and of him with friends.