ＣＲＹＳＴＡＬ ＳＮＯＷ ／ ＫＴＨＦＦ

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But don't get me wrong. My life still went the same. I went to work, accompany my boss and help her. She was truly the best boss I've ever had. I was and still an a secretary for the amazing, Ryu Su-Jeong. She is literally the best and only 1 years older than me.  She was like a therapist for me even thought i was always around her accompanying her and company. I didn't work at my fathers company since i would feel comfortable being my fathers Co-secretary. Mrs. Ryu was the President of the company, Acatalepsy Black Label. Its was a very complex company, its an app, Make up brand, clothing brand, and designer brand. I was happy that i was working here with her because of how humble she was and she didn't expect me to be a perfect secretary. I've been on trips with her to Japan, Spain, The US, and Australia. She always talked to me and made her other secretaries felt loved and thanked by her. She had 2 more secretaries on hand one was, Lee Dong-min but his nickname was Eun woo. He was her younger brother and worked with me at the best in front of her office. He would drive her as well with her other secretary. They lived next to each other with there spouses. He was very handsome and funny. His wife is, Lee Se-Young. She's very beautiful and youthful. She was older than Eun but he loved her for her kind heart. I met her once 7th wheeling on a co-workers date. She matches Eun's personality type perfectly. She also very generous when it comes to gifts or paying. I argued with her on who should had payed the bill and she's very competitive. In the end we got up and ran to the cashier to pay. Obviously being the Ex track star like i was i got there 10 seconds earlier than her and payed for everyone. Everyone felt bad that the "maknae" of group had to pay. But i felt happy and everyone enjoyed the dinner. Moving on to the other secretary she has was Yeo Chang Gu. He also had a wife that was like Eun's. He had amazing voice, personality and good first impressions. He was my older cousin. I got him the job since he didnt enjoy Jungkooks company near him. And i i loved my cousin in law. She was so pretty and my nephew was very handsome i spent most of my weekends when I'm not assisting Mrs. Ryu, i would baby sit my nephew while the others went out. I loved spending time with him an he was the sweetest. He would care for me more than i would for him and he loved to walk more than crawling or being carried. He was truly my happiness and it made me wonder if i should have a son or not.
I would always arrive early than Mrs. Ryu but never before Chang Gu. He would always tease me about how im always 10 mins late after he already came and did my main job. But I didn't mind since we was only tricking himself in doing my job. Now being a secretary isn't easy but its also not very hard. When i was first just starting off Mrs. Ryu gave me tips in what she expected and what where her do's and don'ts in her office or any where she went. She made all of us remember these things before doing anything without her consent. Now i been working for her for around 3 or in a half yeas now and i have it down but i also forget that i might have to talk in Japanese or English to the people i have to set up meetings for, and trust me when i first started off working for her she gave me a free English lesson with the best foreign language teacher and not only did i learn English but Japanese, Mandarin, and some Thai. And she did this for everyone. But she also had ground rules that if we crosses she would give us 30 minutes to fix before we get fired. One of them i did accidentally and well, i did it faster than you would believe. I accidentally forgot to set up a meeting to give a final notice to the Chairman of Indrojensy Designer Brand. And it all worked out but Indeojensy was very pushy and i had to persuade until i gave them my last chance to make a brand deal in which they quickly accepted. And that had been the only thing i messed up. I dont know about Eun or Chang but they seem perfectly sharper than me. But i enjoyed work and so did everyone there. It was fun and an uplifting place to work at. But i dreaded going home. Seeing him in the shared living space and drunk. I would always try to install a door by my side of the house but I didn't know when i would be off and he would be working. So i dealt with it. I would always enter and quickly go to my side and lock the door. Now you might not understand what I'm talking about by," My side". But since me and Tae didn't expect the arranged marriage nor the force," we have to live together". We split the house and thank goodness it was big. On my side it was more spacious since i knew how to organize but i been to Tae side and it was big as well. But its rare for me to be  on that side with him. But when i made it to my side i would shut down in my room and wonder why i was forced into a mess. I personally never wanted this. But i would have to lie at work too. About how "happy" i am with my "husband" and how "great" he was. But it wasn't a happy marriage and it wasn't great. Tae basically only uses me as a sex doll and i bet thats all i am to him. Something that he can put his dick and throw away. Man i really hate how he doesn't even says " thanks" or something after it. He just sleeps and ignores me after it. But it was one of the days he works late so i had peace to myself. I took a very deep bath that day wondering what to do. I knew my space was messy and I decided to clean it. It was nice because every time i cleaned the place my mind cleared and i could finally breathe. Than i heard a rock hit my window. I looked out and i saw someone i thought i would never see aging.  Shin Sangil. I immediately opened the window and said ," Sangil what are you doing here ?"
But he didn't respond. All he did was show his angelic smile and wave. I went out side to see if i could find him. He wasn't there. I was having a major panic attack. I felt like bursting into tears very quick. I was were he was standing and i still couldn't find him. Then i heard his voice say," Dear Ho sook. I love you. I truly do. You been there for me since forever and i cant see myself living with out you. But i feel like its time for me to finally leave. Its been a hell ride that you were riding with me and i feel like nothing helps now. I tried to tell you but i felt like it would make you feel different about me. I feel like it would make you care more for me than you already do and i don't want to stress you with this. But im also done with suffering. Im tried of them calling me a faggot and a gay slut. I hate how you have to protect me even when you get hurt for me and dont care about it. I have that you protect me more than i can protect you. So i made a promise that i wouldn't let you get hurt because of me anymore. And i will protect you from heaven now. I hope you understand why im doing this. Its not just because of those people its because my head is also telling me too. I hope it doesn't hurt you anymore. Ho sook i love you. And i will now continue me deed to you and protect you. Hearing him say those words aging made me sob louder than before. I was on my hands and knees crying. I wanted my best friend back. I needed him now more than he needed me back than. He was so young and if only he had told me he would still be alive. But when Sangil reappeared he touched my head saying " it will all work out and it will be alright." In which i wake up. I had another terror. But it gotten worse. I actually cried unconsciously too. I woke up to have wet tears streaming fro my eyes and i was still in my bath tub. When i got out to see my face the tears kept flowing. Even when I forcefully blinked it all out it kept coming out. Then i decided to see Sangil.