ＣＲＹＳＴＡＬ ＳＮＯＷ ／ ＫＴＨＦＦ

ＴＨＲＥＥ

When i arrived at the Guanchan Mausoleum, i was surprisingly anxious. Its been so long since i came it see Sang-il. But i still can't under go listening to him say his note and hearing him... jump. I missed everything about him. I mostly missed how he would get super shy when his crush came by. I miss the days where i was stress free and he was the only one that was an genuine best friend towards me.
When i walked into the Mausoleum, i felt so many lost and freed spirits. Now you might be say, " thats some Bull shit. Nobody can feel spirits being a certain emotion. " But is did and i was strange. Most of them, almost all where happy and freed but there was one emotion that was covered by all the happiness. It was all the anger and sadness in someone. It was Sang-il's spot that felt this way. And i felt a strong pressure on my chest when i walked closed to it. Then i started speaking.
" Ah, Sang-il oppa, its been so long since i see you. Im sorry that i couldn't see you all those years. I was very busy," and tears were arising from my eyes when i kept going. " i hope your not mad that you couldn't had talked to me. But i'm here and i just want to know," and at this point my tears kept flowing like before and wouldn't stop. " why did you leave. Why did you have to leave me all alone. You knew you where the only thing i really had. I know you been through all the pain just trying to figure out who you where. And remember those times we would listen to Bts. Yeah, i still remember your favorite songs. Like 2!3!, Whalien 52, Dead leaves, N.O. Yeah i still remember how you would blast those song sin your ears and just cry everything out. But now i guess i cant do that with you any more. But i can tell you is that i was married. And yes my father arranged it like you predicted. But he doesn't love me... Yet. So i guess your theory that he will love me right away was false," i gave out a weak laugh. " but i hope everything is going great with you up there. I hope you are having fun with my grandma and my aunty. And say hey to Bong Soon for me. I miss him too, well thanks for listening to me Sang-il I been having a rough time this past few years and i hope i can visit you in the dream realm. Well than, bye bye."
I left with dried tears and shaking while driving home. I was still in my pajamas and hair was still wet but i didn't have time since i was in a rush. I stopped by a convenient store and bought small carton of sweeten light milk, a bag of kimchi that was pre-made, and a pint of red bean ice cream.
When i came home Tae was there, great another reason why i should eat away my stress. I pulled my car in the drive way Tae was still in his car so i got out as fast as i could locked my car doors and ran in the house to my wing. I made it in safe this time. Now you might be wondering why Tae didn't go after you. Well he would when he waits in the drive way in his car and knows in not home he would regularly get out and take my to his wing to fuck. Most time i don't mind it but the thing is. I dont want to when he's horny. I want it when i am but it never happened so i deal with it. And no i dont masterbate i just sleep.
As soon as i went into my room i closed the window and laid in bed. Wonder why i cant just get a divorce. Oh yeah, my dad would dis own me and would be depressed. Now you might be asking why, because he wants to be related to Mr. Kim so bad. I know it sounds dumb but since im the " maknae" of the family i have to do everything my father tells me too.
But i was just relieve that i didnt have to deal with a sober Tae or a Drunk Tae tonight. I turned on my TV to see that the music bank was on. My cousin was on MC-ing with no other than Mark from Got7. Man would they make a beautiful couple. But since her band didn't i send her a " your guys did great, maybe next time unni." And she sent back" Fighting!". I switched it to Mbts and they were playing suits, man does Park Hyung-Sik look hot. I spent that night eating my kimchi, drinking my milk and finishing off with my ice cream. This was the most stress free and happy night i ever had in ages. I stayed awake for a bit praying and doing randoms things. Than i heard a knock at my wing door. I hesitated to open and see who it would had been but i heard a little baby squeal and i knew right away it was either Min Jae or Eun woo. I quickly opened the door  with my lighten up face just to see Tae standing there with the phone on blast with Min Jae on the other end making his baby squeal. My excitement quickly faded.
" What do you need?" I asked sounding very annoyed and pissed
" Well you ran away from me and i didn't even get a chance to say hey."
" Oh fuck off Tae, all you want is sex from me. You don't even treat me like an actual human during sex. You think you can control my positions, when i can and can't come, how much i need to fit in all holes, Tae if you want sex just get a escort or a sex doll because im done with you right now. And forever."
" Awww, don't say that Sooki, you signed up for. Now how about helping Daddy out, i had a really rough day and i really can't erase it from my mind." He said in a pouty voice but making a smirk and pouting at the same time.
"No, get the fuck out of my wing. Your not going to fuck me and it you had such a " Rough Day" beat your meat."
Then i proceeded to close the door but his hands stop it from closing and he pushes his way in.