What the Heart wants

Chapter 3

After a few more days, Rachel and I decide to make our relationship official. The word ‘girlfriend’ is still a bit weird to me, but in a good way. As the days turn into weeks, we start seeing each other more and more, Miri still teases me about it. At first I didn't think Peyton would like it, but to my surprise it's the opposite, everyday she asks me if I'm seeing Rachel again, always showing me that great big smile when I say yes.

After dropping Peyton off at school and walking into my apartment, I sit at my computer, trying to finish a logo for this pirate themed sports bar that's opening soon. I decide to have the stern of a ship in the foreground, a pirate on the tip of it holding a mug of ale, winking and showing a gold tooth. I put the finishing touches to it after a few hours of tweaking. I stop when I hear my phone ring, I hesitate to answer when I don't recognise the number.

“Hello this is Logan.” I make it a habit to answer with my name when I don't know the number, that way the person calling doesn't mistake me for someone else.

“Ellie?” The voice on the other end… I haven't heard it in years.

I wince when I hear that name. “Mom?” I stammer, gripping the edge of my desk, I begin squeezing. It has to be her. Who else calls me that? “How did you get my number?” I ask through gritted teeth.

She takes a moment before answering. “I got it from Dana,” Her breath begins to shudder as she speaks. “She found out I was trying to contact you.”

“Why?” I ask, tightening the grip on my desk. “We have nothing to talk about.”

“Ellie, its-”

“Stop, calling me that!” I interject, almost yelling.

“I don't hear a word from you for eight years Nora, and you think it’s okay to call me and act like nothing happened?”

“Nora? Why not Mom?” She pleads.

“It’s not like you've done anything for me to call you that,” I state, clenching my jaw. “You may have fed me, clothed me, and all that other bullshit. But you weren't there when I needed you!” I shudder.

“Logan I know I made mistakes in the past… but I want to make things right, not just with you, but with Victoria too, and my granddaughter.” She replies, barely able to contain her sobbing.

She doesn't even know about Vickie, she said she talked to Dana… why didn't she tell her?

“Vickie…” I struggle to say the words. “Vickie… she… she's gone.” My voice breaks as I blink back tears.

Nora gasps and goes silent, after a few moments she breaks it. “Logan… I'm so sorry.” Her words are filled with sorrow.

My sadness turns to anger as I scowl, staring at my computer screen. “Oh you're sorry, didn't seem very apologetic when you and Robert threw me out,” This conversation is making me angrier by the second. I grit my teeth, trying my best to contain the scream that's building inside of me. “Just say what you were going to say so I can get back to work.”

I hear muffeled sobs on the other line. “Okay… I guess I was expecting to much. It's your father.”

“What about him?” I sigh.

“He’s… he’s dead Ellie,” She speaks through tears. “Cancer.”

Dead? I don't know what's worse. My father dying, or the fact I don't feel anything. “Is that all? Why should I care?”

Her sadness turns to anger as she speaks. “Logan Thomas dispite what you might think your father loved you.”

“Oh yeah, I could really feel the love when I found everything I owned on the front lawn,” I mutter.