Late Night Love Reads

The Confession

    To the boy at the fair. You were hella fine I just had to write about you. Sorry.
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    It was about 11:18pm when I left the apartment to go to Sam's house for a sleepover. No, my Mom would never let me sleep over at a boy's house under any circumstances, but she was out of town on business and he was white so his parents were on that "Sure! Come on down and sleep with our teen son!" bullshit. It didn't matter anyway because he was one of my best friends. It didn't matter. I kept telling myself this. It really didn't. I'd slept at his before but something was different this time.
            I had to confront him.
If you could even call it that. I was scared to sleep home alone was the reason I told him I was coming.
     knock, knock, knock
                I was at the door.

    "Hey," he smiled and said it quietly.
    His parents were on a date so I didn't really know why he was whispering.
    "Why are you whispering?" I whispered back. "Your parents are out, aren't they?"
    "Well...yeah, but Milo's sleeping."
    I smiled to his back as I followed him upstairs. Milo was his cat. He's so cute.

                       Milo or Sam?

    I tried to be extra quiet for Milo, tip toeing up the stairs. I couldn't help but watch Sam's back muscles as he lead me to his room. He was only wearing a white t-shirt and pajama pants. Nothing special, but special to me that I was the only one getting this view.
    That's what I needed to talk to him about.

    We got to his room. It was dark with one yellow-faded lamp by his bedside, creating shadows everywhere. Though, it was always dark as his walls were black. I remember the day he painted them the shade. "What'r you? Goth?" I chuckled. We were thirteen.

    "No," he defended. "Well then I guess you're permanently goth then, Mikayla."

    "What, why?"

    "You're black," he said this with a goofy smile on his face and I couldn't help but burst out into laughter. I playfully shoved him, "shut up and let's paint this shit."

    "I'm gonna brush my teeth," I said, becoming sad from the memory. As I was in the bathroom I looked at myself in the mirror.
              Just do it.
                       It's fine.
                                Breathe.

    When I walked back to his room my hands shook slightly. The room, still dark. He stood looking out by the full wall length windows across the room. Hands still shaking, less now, I walked to stand beside him. His arms were crossed as he...just stared out at the city. I tried to keep from staring at him but he was just... His hair, blonde, a little messy and shaggy, but the greatest length, glowed a little while staying dim under the hew of lights. Distant.

    I looked away. I gazed out where he seemed to be lost. The night was captivating. The streets were completely empty. No car in sight. Just us. The world had stopped.
                  We
                      Were
                           Alone.

    "Why'd you kiss her?"

    He pulled his attention from the city slowly, "What?" he spoke softly again. Milo.
    I breathed out, "Why? Did you kiss her?" I didn't want to look at him. Ever. I should have, but I kept my eyes on the city. "At the party last night, I saw you kiss Becca, why?"

    "Ah-I-I don't know how to answer that, Mikayla." He was facing me now, but I didn't face him yet. Not yet. I wasn't ready. I kept my head up. Kept my pride.

    "Really?" I was a little pissed then. Why was it so dark? He had turned off the lamp.

    "I don't like her really if that's what you're asking," he paused. "Mikayla..."

    "You don't? Your tongue was saying otherwise, Sam." I just. I just stared at the city. Still. It was safety from this...thing we were doing. I was embarrassed.

    "I don't know what you mean, Mik-"

    "Forget it," I wanted him to stop saying my name, it was making me soft-

   He cut me off. "I don't know what you mean, Mikayla," he took a step closer, sharing his body heat, "because you're not saying...what you really want to say."
    This made me look. I looked into his eyes. Blue. The hew made them sparkle. A shadow cast across his face halfway.

Embarrassment faded.

    He leaned closer. Slowly. His lips were by my ear, "Noah said he had it in the bag with you," whispering again.
    "Why do you think I kissed her?"

    Quiet. Everything went perfectly quiet when he said this.

    Just us.

    The world had stopped.

                  We
                      Were
                          Alone.

    He leaned back. We didn't say anything. The only remote movement came from the flutter of his eyelashes as he slowly looked from my eyes, cheeks, then my lips. The look in his eyes when he looked back up was priceless. A conformation of reciprocation. I brush his ear with my thumb, lightly holding and caressing his neck. Gliding my hand down, taking in the muscles of his shoulder. To his bicep. Then elbow. Forearm. Finally, hand. I watched him react to my touch. He closed his eyes for a minute, lightly breathing in.
    This was my conformation. Our finalization.

Our eyes met, and we kissed. My arms immediately wrapped around his neck. Hands in his hair as he pulled me closer. We were chest to chest when I gave him entrance and the moment intensified. Sam let out a low groan and I swear I'd never geard anything better.

    Pulling apart our foreheads stayed magnetized, and we held each other. We stood there for what felt like ten seconds when...
                             Meow*
    Without looking, Sam grinned, laughing as I giggled into the silent night.

    "We woke Milo."