The moon was following him.
That was the best his tired mind could do. He knew the moon didn�t actually move � he�d spent so many nights staring at it sitting solid in the sky above him. But tonight, it just seemed that he couldn�t shake the thing.
He would have preferred darkness. A nice cover of clouds would have suited him just fine, keeping his movements somewhat secret. He knew he couldn�t help crashing through underbrush � if there was one thing everyone was always right about, it was that he was such a pathetic klutz.
He couldn�t hear them anymore, Argo�s hoofbeats quiet for the night. Their campfire was long since gone as well, a tiny dot of fire in the distance. Grecian nights were intemperate, chilly one minute and fair the next. He wished it had been warm tonight. Naturally, it wasn�t. He fought off a shiver as he trudged on, pushing the tiny voice yearning for the heat of a fire out of his head. Of course, making that voice disappear only left room enough for�
"GODS! I�M SUCH AN IDIOT!" he yelled into the night before he could even think to stop himself. "You�d think I�d catch on sooner or later! Always snuggling together at night! Those looks when they think I don�t see them! For Zeus� Sake, they BATHE TOGETHER! Why didn�t I see it?" Another thought hit him square in the chest. He spun in the direction he had come from and focused on the eentsy orange flicker in the distance. "Why didn�t they tell me?" His heart flinched the way it always had at home when he�d been the odd triplet out, Mother fawning all over Jayce, Father strutting around like a peacock over some atrocity Jett had been responsible for� and Joxer left watching. His eyes misted quickly and since he was alone � and isn�t that always the way? � he didn�t fight it back. The woods loomed over him like giants, the moon heavy and round over his head. He felt tiny.
There it was, though. Bedroll for one. Dinner for one. Inn-room for one. He�d always fancied that Xena and Gabrielle were, at the very least, his friends. No matter what he hoped in his heart of hearts about the blond bard�s feelings for him, he always knew that the three of them were close. Not close enough to let me in on THAT little bit of information, though, right?He chuckled bitterly to himself, feeling as if he�d been punched in the gut.
"You coulda told me, guys�" He muttered grumpily to himself and to the night and to the "friends" he�d left behind to whatever snoggery and shagging they got up to in the outdoors. He didn�t want to think about it too much. "You coulda said� something. Anything. I mean, I�m not the swiftest horse on the team, but I think I coulda handled it."
A laugh took him by surprise, especially since it was his own. He turned back to the path he was forging through the forest and snorted to himself. "Sure you coulda. Now there�s a lie if I ever heard one." He could imagine the amazing stutter-stammer-faint routine he would have performed on hearing that one. Never mind if he�d actually caught them. His cheeks flamed at the mere thought of that confrontation. He wasn�t sure if it was actually possible to die of embarrassment, but he was sure that he�d come close in that situation.
A jaw-cracking yawn snuck up on him, reminding him of just how long it had been since he�d bothered to rest. He and Xena and Gabs had been pushing feet since dawn� no, before then. He�d been up before them, when the sky had still been brilliant purple and orange with wispy cotton clouds. When the day had held so much promise. The two women had still been asleep, just this side of cuddled together but probably still mindful of his presence. More guilt heaped on - he was cramping their style, and who knew for how long. Just when he thought he couldn�t feel any worse�Aphrodite�s Frilly Pink Nightie! I can�t be this pathetic�
Licks of gold crept from between the trees, warming the forest in front of him. For a second, he thought that maybe everyone was right about him. Clueless-to-the-end-Joxer, no sense at all. And now, it looked like he�d been traveling in circles. Wouldn�t THAT just be great? He�d always considered himself a fair enough tracker. Getting lost would be the final straw. Gathering up whatever he had left, Joxer of Corinth stomped noisily through the underbrush, not caring what it was doing to his shoes, and decided that if that little orange flicker that had turned up on his horizon was what he thought it was, he was just going to give up this whole stupid �hero� dream and farm turnips for the rest of his life.