Laughing Tori

No Longer Waiting, No Longer Watching

I sit in the dark corners of her eyes.
Always watching, Always waiting.
I sit waiting to pounce.
Always waiting, Always watching.
I am her anxiety, her weaknesses.
Her insecurities are my playground.
Her eyes are mine, mine are her's.
Her mind is my cage.
I sit in the dark corners of her eyes.
Always watching, always waiting.
I sit in the dark waiting to pounce.
Always waiting, always watching.
She smiles magnificently, and yet she is afraid.
Always thinking of the worst.
Always watching, always waiting.
I am her demon, her anxiety, her worst thoughts.
Always watching, always waiting.
I am her fear, her insecurities, her demon.
She lives her life with a mask of happiness.
It brings me glee to see her suffer but there is something else there,
Something that seems to be sickened by my glee.
I wait trapped behind her mask, her shell.
I sit in the dark corners of her eyes.
Always watching, always waiting.
Her eyes are mine, mine are her's.
She is my cage, my shell of happiness.
I am her insecurities, her yoke of darkness.
Her eyes seem bright, but they are dull.
Dull with the mundane routine of a sleepless night.
Dull with the stress of life.
Dull with the repeated fight with me, her demon.
I sit in the dark corners of her eyes.
Always watching, always waiting.
I sit in the dark waiting to pounce.
Always waiting, always watching.
Her thoughts are swimming.
Swimming with spontaneous things.
Swimming with thoughts that She would never say.
Swimming with good.
I am her demon, Her anxiety.
She is warm.
Warm with the resolve to fight
Warm with victory.
Warm with light.
Her insecurities are my playground.
She over thinks.
It overwhelms her.
Brings me glee and something more.
The million thoughts of what could go wrong.
Of all the possibilities of the worst case scenarios.
Her suffering brings me glee and something more.
Her eyes are mine, mine are her's.
I am her demon, her yoke of darkness.
She fears so many and yet she is strong.
She refuses to give in.
I stand tall against the wall she builds.
She refuses to let me win.
I refuse to cower before her.
She refuses to let go.
I refuse to crumble.
She refuses to be sad
And I am beginning to understand that something more.
She wants to be genuinely happy.
I want to be in control.
She wants to be free of my chains.
I want to be free of her cage.
I sit in the dark corners of her eyes.
Always watching, always waiting.
I sit in the dark waiting to pounce.
Always waiting, always watching.
I am her anxiety, her weaknesses.
Her insecurities are my playground.
Her eyes are mine, mine are her's.
She is my cage, and I am her chains.
I am her demon, hiding in the dark.
Waiting for her down fall.
And yet.....
She forgives me.
She forgives me for all that I have done to her.
For making her life harder.
I am her demon and She forgives me.
She forgives me for egging on her deepest woes.
For all that I am, I am still her and She is me...
I am her dark secrets and She is my cage of light.
I am her demon and She forgives me.
Always watching, Always waiting
I understand that something more.
Always waiting, Always watching
I had been gleeful to watching her suffer.
But there was always something more,
Something that always felt pain to see her suffer.
I always watched, always waited.
Now I understand what that pain was.
I always waited, always watched.
She could have been me and I her.
Could have caved to her darkness,
Could have never forgiven,
Could have done so many things,
And yet....
She didn't, she forgave me,
She didn't cave.
I understand that feeling of happiness.
That feeling of joy.
Of sadness.
Of anger...
Of forgiveness.
I am no longer her demon. For we are the same.
No longer does she have anxiety.
No longer Fears, No more insecurities.
No more doubts.
No more darkness.
All that's left is a light so bright.
That even I, her darkness, am no longer a shadow.
I am no longer her demon, no longer a shadow.
For we are the same.
She is me and I am her.
She forgave me when I was her demon.
Never held a grudge against me.
Forgiven, that is what I am.

~Laughing Crows~