Love After Marriage

Chapter 23 - Look Of Distant.

Nathan Lawrence

We came back home in pure silence and the home that once made me happy, had turned all gloomy.

As soon as we returned, she mad herself straight away to her room and banged her door shut. For once, I wanted to run for her so that I could confront her of what had happened before but my feet refused to move any further as her words lingered in my head.

"We would add up some space between us so that when the day comes...any of us wouldn't leave each other with heavy hearts." Her saying, that made my heart stung to even think about it.

Separating away from her was the last thing I want but that's the first thing she thinks for me.

I, too, locked myself in my bedroom the whole day. I was sitting like a corpse, feeling nothing alike the living human being.

My handphone's screen notified a random message and as I held onto it, my eyes never read anything as I was busy looking at our first picture together.

Our wedding photo, which I kept as my lock screen image since the wedding. This photo was taken in my own handphone by mother and when I found this in my gallery, I quickly reset it as my lock screen.

We both looked so lively as we were married by love and she looked exactly like a living angel in this picture. My angel, my love.

It pained me even more to think of all this and the situation we were in right now had only worsen it.

*****

It's been 3 days since that dreadful day and we didn't even had a civil talk after that. Even at work, her work relating things would be perfectly in time and I had no ways to call her in to at least have a civil conversation.  It's as if she's avoiding me, but that's what she want. To be away from me.

I swallowed the lump I had on my throat and everytime whenever I crossed by her room, my heart aches in yearning. I felt my vision getting a little blur and I kept it to myself, controlling hard enough to not let it fall.

I just came back home and after taking a shower, I'm making myself some black coffee as usual in the kitchen.

"Nathan. " I was alerted and my body froze on the faint calling of my name.

"We....need to talk. " I heard her continuing and I was debating wildly within my mind whether to give in right away or not. Though, eventually she would only push me away if I let us talk but what if it's something important?

Wait, is she's okay? By this thought, I had already veered to face her and there she's standing. Her head bowed down a bit as one of her hand rested on the kitchen island while another rested on her side. She looked distant and somewhat weak in presence, her dark circle around her eyes had only shows of how she's not taking care of herself.

My love, what happened to you?

I was staring at her but as she cleared her throat, I got into my senses and nodded my head to do the talking.

"Well...my mother just called and she told me about this trip they arranged. Your parents are also joining, she told me that they had been planning this since the wedding...our wedding. So, we should be going for this trip with our families. Are you...okay with this? " she asked softly, gapping up a random space between each sentences as she looked at me expectingly.

What did she want me to say? Is the look of expectation means that she wanted me to say yes or no?

"Would you be okay? " I asked her, wanting to know of what she really thinks about it.

"I'm okay. I just wanted your answer. " she said, without a moment of thinking.

"This wouldn't be just a trip, Ishita. They are planning to set us up for the honeymoon we never had and I'm sure we couldn't keep up the spaces in between us as you wanted if we ever attend this trip. Think again and let me know, Ishita. " I explained the probability of such a trip and she stared at me while thinking.

Of course, she's going to say no after thinking of all the possiblity we might be needed to do together for the sake of our parents so I gave her an easy way to convince our families.

"It's okay, Ishita. Just tell her that I'm going abroad for an important meeting. " I informed while turning around to hold onto my cup of coffee.

"But you have none as I still know your schedules for the next two months." she said and I nodded my head awkwardly as a yes.

Oh, yes. How can I forget, she's still in my company and I don't want her quit at all. But I want her to pursue her dreams freely so I retained myself  to let her leave the company when she wanted too.

"Then, why the lie? " she asked.

"Because you made it clear that the last thing you want is to be around me and if we go to such trips, it would only drift us closer. " I explained, a little apprehensive of what I really said. But that was the truth, right?

"I don't really say that I don't want to be around you and I really wanted to go for this trip. I mean, I love sightseeing and we should definitely do this...at least to show them that we are doing good in this marital life. " Do I hear it right? But what about adding up some spaces in between us? Wait, does this mean that she's okay to be around me? Then, why was she avoiding me?

"I don't want to force you. If you really don't want to go in this trip, then it's fine. " she uttered sadly, her lips slightly pouting. My feet was about to take off nearer towards her but I controlled the damn feelings to hold her in my arms.

Her eyes sparkled in enthusiasm at the mention of sightseeing though so how can I deny when I know that she will be enjoying it.

"No, I wanted to go too. I just thought....that maybe you would say no but then you said yes and now I'm fine to go to this trip. " I assured her and her lips puckered into a sweet smile.

I don't know of how many more heartbreaks were awaiting me in this trip but I'm ready to face whatever it takes to make this woman smile.