What Once Was

outline

I knew I was in love the moment I heard your laugh. I knew I was in love the moment I held you in my arms for the first time. I knew I was in love the moment I sat by the fire with you that one summer and listened to the fire crackle as we watched the stars go by.

Loving you was as easy as breathing.

All of our clothes smelled like smoke after. You suggested we take them off and wash them, I just laughed. But of course I did. Your clothes smelled like you and I was grateful to not have to ask for a shirt later. We laid down on your bed and I held you as you rested your head on my chest. I leaned down to kiss the top of your head and it smelled like a mix of you and smoke. I loved that smell. I wish I could live in that moment forever.

But the breathing became labored.

We got in fights more and more after the summer ended. I was forever stressed about college and applications and you were forever pissed that I didn't have time for you. But what's a girl to do? I tried so hard to make it work, to balance school with social life, but it never clicked. We drifted. I heard you started talking to another girl. I got drunk one night and called you crying. My speech was slurred. I told you I loved you and that I wanted us to work. You said you loved me too but you needed me to make time for you. I remember hearing your voice waiver, you were crying too. I was drunk, I told you I could. Nothing changed in the weeks to come.

Maybe that was for the best.

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I'm just starting to write again and it's honestly pretty rough. I'm going to put a song suggestion in the header picture of each chapter that has same feel as the chapter. This wasn't really a chapter but more a filler before I introduce the characters and story. Hope you enjoy!

Emilee