Anyone But You (COMPLETED)

Chapter 23

AN
Warning
Slight signs of Depression
*cough*
like me...😔💔💔💔
*cough*

YN POV (play the song up top, it helps build up the depressing mood in this chapter but read slowly)
I read the title of the notebook

Chaeyoung's Diary
Rawrrrr~~~🦁🦁🦁

I flipped to a random page in her diary and what I landed on made me open my eyes wide open
I began to read it, crying more and more as I get farther into it

September 3rd, 2018
Huh? That was me and Chaeyoung's supposed 1monthsary

When I first met YN, he seemed so sexy and cute but also kind and warm-hearted, he was every woman's dream man but.....
When I heard that he got into a car accident today... I cried... so much that I became depressed and started cutting my wrists in the bathroom alone without my members knowing and considered hanging myself....Why you ask...? Because September 3rd is our 1 month anniversary
That's how much I love him

Despite only knowing him for only one month, it felt like such an eternity since we've fell in love and formed an unbreakable bond even though we were just strangers who met through our friends on a blind date

Sure I asked him out through lust because out of how he looks with his big biceps and rock-hard abs...
but over time, I fell in LOVE with him and not lust

He respects me not just as his girlfriend but also... as a woman and I think to myself "He treats me so nice and I want to marry him...Have I found the one right for me?"

I tried to visit him and want to see if he's alive then cry in his arms, begging him that we will grow old together
Have a family...
See them grow...
Find love...
And die together...

But when I found out that I couldn't find the hospital YN was registered into, I became depressed
I began to inflict self harm upon myself

I just can't imagine how I can live on as an idol, putting up a fake smile on the outside and suffer so much on the inside... because I lost the dear love of my life

YN...if you are still alive somewhere, please
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Don't leave me in the dark

I dropped the notebook back onto the desk and collapsed onto the bed next to me, my eyes turning red as I tear up and gasp at the painful loneliness I put on Chaeyoung's shoulders

My finger began to tremble and my knees becoming soft

Eventually, my mind went blank, thinking of nothing but confusion and frustration

What am I supposed to do?
Should I stay with Mina and abandon Chaeyoung who I already have hurt so much?
Or should I go back to Chaeyoung and welcome her back into my arms, protecting her from all the evil things in the world but leave Mina again?

I walked back out of the room slowly as no one was there and into Mina's room who was already asleep

I got into her bed and cuddled up with her with an emotionless expression

And I thought to myself,
What should I do?