It's Hard Enough Saying Hello

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No matter how many ways I could try to say it, it never comes out just right. I might try to say something as simple as, "Hello!", or "How are you?" only for it to come out as a completely jumbled mess or a bad excuse as to why I was even in your general area. I don't understand it, why in the world does my chest feel almost unbearably tight? 

You have this... this way of doing things that makes it difficult to breathe. I always try to stay away because when we make eye contact, I get terrified even though I'm loving every second at the same time. I don't get it, Why the Hades are my palms so sweaty as I'm writing this, quietly rolling my eyes at my awful, cliche letter to you?

I usually need to clear my throat to speak so that my voice sounds at least relatively sane. If I didn't... well let's not go into all of that. I could be having the worst day, but if you even start to talk with me I would light up. I can't quite comprehend it, even if my all of my work had been torn to shreds... What is it about you that if you sent a smile in my direction, I would beam in absolute happiness all day long?

You are way out of my league but I can't help hoping and dreaming that one day you will notice how much I care and you will realize that I want to put all of my efforts into you and your gorgeous, chestnut skin and wild, splatter paint freckles. I don't quite grasp it, how do you not accept that you are madly marvelous, inside and out?

I want to go up to you and make you realize that you are talented and original and creative and I could probably come up with thousands upon thousands of words to describe how utterly magnificent you are, but that is not the point, at least not the main one anyways. The point is that I see all of this in you and I love it to pieces. I want to say this to your face and admit that I can't help but always love you for all your amazing imperfections! For all of your delicate curves and rough edges and everything that makes you who you are!

But, oh the lord already knows... It's hard enough saying hello.

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