Little Do You Know

The Day

It's the night of the proposal and Jin's a nervous wreck.

Jin smiled at everyone, bowing when he received a comliment and running around to help any guest who looked around for something. Jin's night was busy, but the worst part was that Namjoon seem to be everywhere. Wherever Jin walked, he would suddenly see a familiar all black suit with dark grey neck tie.

He double-checks, triple-checks everything, makes sure that the menu, the food arrive on time, and the ring (delivered via Namjoon's manager) in its velvet box, to be delivered by the waiter at the right moment when Namjoon calls for him. His hands tremble with anxiety and this is the most heart attack-inducing moment in his life, including his first office presentation with his bosses. The restaurant's been briefed, the chefs are notified, and as the clock ticks towards the appointed time Jin's jumping so badly he has to be forcibly sat down, a cup of hot chocolate shoved into his hands. Jin is looking for something much stronger (and maybe illegal) to soothe his nerves but he can't let himself be inebriated, has to ensure the engagement's success.

Namjoon. He has to think about Namjoon.

Taehyung arrives for moral support (for his sake more than Namjoon's, he's sure) and talks him down every time he starts to hyperventilate, which is around every ten minutes or so. He's going to be a firsthand witness to his trainwreck of heartbreak, unstoppable, morbid, fascinating, and finally he takes pity on him, letting him down shot after shot of vodka to make sure he doesn't lose his mind.

An hour before Sunjeon's supposed to come Namjoon arrives, decked out in a coat and tie and it's all Jin can do to not cry at the sight. God, Namjoon looks so handsome it's physically painful for him to look into his face, and when he finally does, it's a shock.

"Namjoon, your face! What happened?!" Make-up can't hide the telltale evidence of a bruise on his cheek, and Namjoon blushes.

"It's... It's nothing, I got into an accident." He mumbles, physically taking a step back and Jin stops, hands hovering, about to touch. Hurt, Jin lets his hands fall down, exasperated and irritated and adoring, because only Namjoon can hurt himself before he proposes to the love of his life. "Don't worry about it, Jin-hyung." He looks dazed, distant, and Jin doesn't blame him. Any man will be scared shitless of proposing marriage.

Still, Jin soldiers on. "Okay, so when she comes in..." He tells Namjoon the plan, from start to finish, and it's relatively easy to follow. Namjoon nods along but still looks like he's on another plane, only coming back when Taehyung slaps his shoulder, hard.

"Good luck, hyung. I hope she says yes." He says, all teeth and gums and Namjoon winces, nods his thanks and stumbles to the designated private table. Jin's too preoccupied to scold his younger cousin, because fuck, it's only 30 minutes before the event starts and he needs to check on dessert.

Sunjeon arrives almost an hour late, which puts them drastically behind schedule, and Jin twists the tenth napkin in his hands to shreds. Still, the dinner's going well enough, with the courses coming out smoothly from the kitchen and any minute now they're going to finish eating and Namjoon pops the question. Taehyung's a steady presence on his back, rubbing between his shoulder blades soothingly but Jin doesn't notice, eyes trained on the sight before him. Dishes get cleared, the atmosphere's good, the waiter's called over for wine—

Jin sighed, he was suppose to be there as a planner of wedding not as some sort of slave. But that chick, Sunjeon. Jin was terrified of her. She had seen him in weakest moment, she probably didn't know anything about his feelings for Namjoon, or what they had been, but Jin still felt humilation whenever he saw her.

Then he sees Namjoon get down on one knee in front of her, and it's more than he can bear.

  The champagne glass shatters as it hits the ground, the sound catching the attention of the nearby patrons. Jin can't imagine the look on his face at that moment, but doesn't try to find out.  He just grab another glass with wine bottle and Just turns around and runs, away from the sight, away from everyone else, sight blurred and washed away by the wet heat streaming down his face. He found veranda lighting throught the dark and  it was a little bit far from Namjoon's wedding party. Jin walk slowly to veranda while sipping his wine. 

He thought he could bear it, seeing Namjoon getting married to someone else, but he can't, can't lie to himself, can't help but admit that it fucking hurts, a crowbar digging itself into his chest and levering his heart out. Maybe he's in denial all this time, that Namjoon won't really propose, that Namjoon eventually sees how much she doesn't care for him while he's there, always beside him, always willing to pick up the pieces of his fragmented relationship. Jin loves him, is so in love with him he's willing to give him up, but only to someone who deserves him.

Kang Sunjeon doesn't deserve him.       


"Do yourself a favor and learn to walk away.
When a connection starts to fade,
Learn how to let it go. When a person starts to mistreat you,
learn how to move on..to something and someone better.
Don't waste your energy trying to force something that isn't meant to be.."
-Seokjin-