I've never had a reason,
To worry about life,
But there's not a fear in comparison,
Than this epiphany, this cruel truth
That looms over all whom I know
Like some sort of 'Social Scythe.'
...........
And this truth won't leave.
I know it can't go,
I'll be damned if I wear it on my sleeve
Where ever I may go.
..........
People can lie all they want,
But I can't ever trust,
The ones who claim acceptance
Then deny it,
As if the act is just.
..........
You're either eager to know my secret
Or you don't really care,
I just have to say it,
I'm really in for it now,
I'm done for,
I swear.
..........
I walked home the other day
And wound up on the other side of town.
She was all I could see in front of me,
To the left: her eyes
To the right: her hair,
Both bright and caramel brown.
..........
She talks too much or talks too little
Depends on who it is,
But I don't want a conversation
I just want another kiss.
..........
No, I'm not in love,
And yes, I know I'm a liar ,
But I guess lying is both a mask
And a cure,
I can't decide my feelings about her,
I guess I'm just indecisive
...Actually I'm not too sure.
..........
She's always day dreaming
She can't see me screaming
For her to kiss me,
But I guess I'm not so clear.
If I'm gone too long
I wonder if she'll miss me,
And wonder about the confessions
She'd never pay attention to
Or hear.
..........
Even if she wanted me,
As much as I want her,
We'd still be in a tight snag,
Or simply screwed over,
If you'd prefer.
..........
When she touches me,
No matter the intention,
A chill runs down my spine.
This is about as heavy a conviction
That you will ever find.
..........
I should be jealous of her perfect skin and such,
But I've found myself fantasizing
About these things.
..........
She has claws for fingers,
Clasped around my heart,
Ripping it forcefully,
Unintentionally,
At it's seams.
..........
Her soft skin on mine,
The echoing,
Deafening,
Thud of my pounding heart,
These are the things I cannot keep inside of my mind,
But mean nothing on her part.
..........
"A love not returned, "
Sure, you've heard that line a million times.
But there is a catch, right?
Why am I in so much trouble,
If I confess to the world about the love of my life?
Why would I be ridiculed?
What's with all the strife?
..........
Every word.
Every bleeding word.
Is part of a list.
About the things I cannot keep inside,
of my mind,
Things I can no longer hide,
But I mask them with these silly rhymes.
..........
The things that even would make my parents bitter and snide.
And the world would not ignore me but stab me dead in the street, at night.
And this girl would not love me,
But avoid me,
Ignore me,
Leave me,
In a heartbeat.
And that breaks my heart all the time.
..........
This list...
Its all true,
The one side of it is she doesn't love me,
After all she's only a girl,
A busy girl a that,
With way too much to do,
The other trouble I'm in is that,
Judge me if you will...
..........
I'm a girl too.
