Her Beef 5: Ride Or Die

Chapter 34

Desire

I woke up just feeling like I was not in the mood. Thank God for my dad and Jewel cause they came and got the kids.

My mind was racing and I just didn't know what to do about Aubrey and I.

I took a shower and just put on some sweats and waited for my girl's to come over.

Shakeya, Kelly, and my cousin Lovely. I needed to talk to them and get their thoughts.

I heard my door open and slam so I knew it was Key cause she had a key.

"Des why the fuck are you in New York instead of being in Cali?" Shakeya asked falling down on my couch.

"I just wanted space from all this shit with Aubrey."

She looked at me like I was crazy.

"Bitch he here in New York! You went to his show! Are you really trying to get space or are you trying to keep up appearances?" She asked.

I didn't know how to answer that. The whole world knew about our problems.

Hell they even talked about it on The Breakfast Club.

"I am trying to keep up anything his kids wanted to see him."

"Des I love you I really do, but you have to make a choice and stand by it. I know you love him, but how much more are you willing to take? When will enough be enough? It's ok to not know, but don't keep being a fool." Shakeya said before getting up and answering the door.

I have never asked myself those questions before.

When is it enough? When will it all stop?

The tears just began to fall. The girls came back in the room.

"Damn Desire." They all said.

"My heart says to stay but my mind says to go." I said wiping away my tears.

"I just don't want my kids to got through what Shad and I went through not having our father there." I said to them.

I was trying to hold it together, but Shakeya and her bluntness broke me down.